A little lost and overwhelmed

[Southernpandora]

Hi! I'm not even sure where to begin... And please excuse my lack of knowledge regarding correct verbiage...

I am most definitely submissive. And I definitely have a Daddy kink. That's about where my certainties end.

I was told once that I would be considered a Brat. What little info I've found on it, sounds like me (?). I am not one to be tamed. I thrive on being mischievous and love the punishment that follows. I've never been with anyone who has experience as a dom... It's been mostly trial and error, experimentation and guiding my partners in the type of experience I find enjoyable (of course, only to the extent of what they're comfortable with). 

I'm not sure where to start, how to go about any of this... 

 

 

 

[MsDrawers]

Hey, we all have to start somewhere! Take your time, read, ask questions, there's no fire. If it's a relationship you want, then kink is a big element of that rather than the whole thing so it's atleast as important that you're thinking with that in mind too. A good dom, experienced or no, will be respectful and patient rather than pushing hard and fast. If you wouldn't tolerate a behaviour outside of kink, you shouldn't tolerate it here either. Remember too, that you get to define who you are and work out what it is that works for you (and beware those uber doms who come flocking to help you find your feet). Also, there are no hard and fast rules, these things are fluid. You may find much of how you express your kinky self depends on partners and shifts a little as you go along. First things first, what kind of sub do you think you are? Do you like rules and structure or is this strictly for play (I'm an arsey bitch outside the bedroom, no shame there)? Do you respond to punishment and consequences? What kind of kinks do you enjoy within play? Start slow and find your way around bit by bit. Good luck, and welcome!

[Deleted Member]

To start maybe put your pic the right way up. Kind of ***ful.
You are not single so are you looking for a Dom as well? Or want to learn with your bf?
There are many things to read on this site from forums to magazines about newbies starting bdsm...

[Southernpandora]

Sorry about the pic, it was fine until it posted and I don't know how to fix it 😣

I'm married, but have reached a point that, although I love him and we have responsibilities, he is unwilling to meet any of my needs and it has been discussed that after putting my needs on hold for 10+ years, if he isn't willing to put any effort in,  I will tend to them elsewhere. 

I have pushed everything to the side for my family. We all have needs and we are all deserving of fulfillment.  I've just reached the point where I am making more of a priority of my needs now that my role has less responsibility.

 

 

[Deleted Member]

I still don't know what doing on this, you look beautiful in the picture tho, have a look at mine 😍

[Deleted Member]

I'm also new to this but if you want to talk sometimes is a good way to learn.

[Nicky898]

These things take time, read and learn as much as you can , find out what you like , chat to people , find out what sub you are, there is no set rules. Are you looking for a relationship . Get to understand your wants and needs. Know that just like in any relationship/ vanilla etc, what behaviour is acceptable. Communication is key. Consent, compatibility. What play do you want to try, what is off the table . Things may change as you grow . Hope this helps 😁

[Southernpandora]

Thank you all who have commented so far... I know my relationship status may seem confusing to some, but it is not with malicious intent that I am branching out. It is with careful consideration and a lot of discussion.

I am inquisitive and know to ask questions to establish what is needed/accepted by anyone else invloved. That has always been my rule, regardless of the partner. 

[jon-4180]

i would like to talk
may I private message you

[jon-4180]

if you want to talk

[jon-4180]

I would say try to explore your fetish and see if you're truly into it and if you are find willing partners

[Southernpandora]

  6 minutes ago, jon-4180 said:

i would like to talk
may I private message you

Expand  

Of course ☺

[jon-4180]

thank you gut you have a filter on

[jon-4180]

thank you gut you have a filter on

[jon-4180]

  3 minutes ago, Southernpandora said:

Of course ☺

Expand  

thank you but you have a filter on

Edited June 5, 2021 by jon-4180
i can not type lol

[jon-4180]

  47 minutes ago, Southernpandora said:

Thank you all who have commented so far... I know my relationship status may seem confusing to some, but it is not with malicious intent that I am branching out. It is with careful consideration and a lot of discussion.

I am inquisitive and know to ask questions to establish what is needed/accepted by anyone else invloved. That has always been my rule, regardless of the partner. 

Expand  

since you have a filter on and I cannot message you directly can you message me thank you

Edited June 5, 2021 by jon-4180

[jon-4180]

mind the extra messages I'm suffering from lag so sometimes my computer freezes and I send two messages not one 

Edited June 5, 2021 by jon-4180

[Wiseonthree]

The best thing for you to do is to Read, educate yourself on what it means to be safely a member of the community. Conversing with other submissive-minded individuals will allow you to learn from their experiences that they choose to share. Be cautious of those whom wish to mentor you so eagerly. There is always a alternative motivation. Fetlife has a large repository of groups and members which you can follow and interact with. Cat and Mouse games that can be had with a Brat is quite an amazing thing for myself, where my mentor just likens it to hair pulling. So it's important to start off with "I'm a submissive brat" when interacting with people or putting it on your profile. I would not seek a 'relationship' on any of these sites outside of friendship so early in the game. Stay safe, stay honest, and enjoy your time!

[Invisible71]

Take it slow and steady. 

 

Most of all find somebody that you would trust with your life and be sure of it before you release yourself to them.