Looking for FLR/sub relationship, advice please.

July 29, 2018

Hello everyone, Hope you're all well?

New to this scene and hoping to get some advice and pointers. I have looked through previous post and picked up some good sites and advice so far - so thank you to those who have contributed.

As with most newbies I've had the numerous dommes I've spoken with who have just tried harvesting personal info and/or ***. I can spot them a mile off and is not really the issue for this thread. Just as most newbies have found its disheartening as being in a new scene is exciting and you're eager to get involved. Anywho....

I've always found I get more pleasure from pleasing women then my own sexual gratification. I would say I have a face sitting fetish but this is still in its infancy as I am still finding out what I like and not.

I wouldn't consider myself that attractive and my location means an extremely small and tight nit circle. So I am finding it difficult to find women in a reasonable distance to myself as well as finding people I can chat with and talk to about this let alone finding someone I can explore this further with.

So before I completely go off tangent would be good to hear some feedback and so forth and I hope this is relatable as to the kind of info and advice I'm after?

July 30, 2018

Not sure what you need advice with? I'll go off what you've said in here though.

There's no mention of what you're into on your profile, so anyone looking would have no idea of whether they're compatible sexually. You can choose (in settings) what fetishes you have, you can also elaborate on them in your profile for emphasis or to clarify more on them. Personality wise there's nothing there either but so long as your messages are good this can be fine.*

You acknowledge that you aren't that attractive.This is fine and not everyone is looking for an adonis. But you could at least try to make yourself look interesting or approachable in your pictures.

Location, no big deal so long as you're willing to travel, relocate, or look for someone who is willing to. LDR can work also but tend to need to be working towards being with each other irl at some point or they fizzle out. On here there is a section called events, you can find munches there, you could also use search to find them or make a topic in the forums (in the online munch section) to ask more about what is in your location.

Re finding someone willing to chat, there is a chatroom on here you could try to join in with. Without a profile or interesting first message it's unlikely you will find people to chat to, maybe not impossible but it definitely lessens your chances.

*I'm in a FLR/MDLB/CG relationship now, you have just as much chance of meeting someone on here as anywhere else even with a not great profile, but you've got to have something to get people interested and retain their interest.

Edited July 30, 2018 by 3SumQueen
removed some personal info.

July 30, 2018

Thanks for your reply.

I have been looking at the munches page and sites with a list of them on. Also been in the chat rooms the past few days.

With my profile I had filled in the large list of kinks and fetishes in the settings section, I must not have saved it. Thanks for pointing that out.

One thing I have never liked is having my picture taken, it feels like the most unnatural thing in the world to me. I am aware it is an issue on an online environment and have yet to solve this.

I've spoken to a couple of members who have kindly given me some of there time and been helpful.

August 1, 2018

I can invited you to munches on every week activities

August 1, 2018

Thank you but you might be a little to far for me to travel.

August 1, 2018

I lived in Lincoln for 12 years so I know exactly what you mean..I often felt it was the kink black hole of the country..in fact so much so, it was while I was living there that I began online searches for like minded people..I never learnt to drive so used to set my sights on places with decent travel links..without knowing how far/long your prepared to travel though or be away for, I cant be much use in that regard.

You don't have to have a face pic as your avatar, a lot of us, myself included, have one in our friends only folder and just use something else..I'm very plain to look at, and found a face picture on my profile just got insults and rude comments, despite saying I wasn't glam or pretty on my profile, which just wears you down and knocks your confidence it's okay to not to be a supermodel or Adonis, most people do have unrealistic expectations..I've seen some ugly, ugly men demand young and beautiful women only contact to them for example , all you can be is yourself, a smile goes a long way, maybe use a picture that's less ***d, again I totally understand about self concious face pics, those of us who are unphotogenic all have the same issue ..but if you are worried, switch it up, make it private and use your personality to attract interest, once someone likes who you are they may be less shallow when it comes to looks..just a thought.

And welcome to the site and forums 🙂

Edited August 1, 2018 by Deleted Member

August 1, 2018

Luckily I drive MsJax so getting to that quick train to London isn't a problem. I got to Manchester pretty frequently so those are good options for me. I did live in Sheffield for a number of years, just long enough to forget how dead Lincoln is before I returned. If you don't wanna go to the pub or to crappy night clubs the choices pretty much don't exist do they ;)

I'm not worried about my pic it's not really on my nature, just really dislike having my pic taken. And that pic is my neutral face 😂 I know I look like a miserable git.

I have got a different pic I will upload - hopefully it will be allowed?

Thank you for your reply and welcome it is appreciated.