AlexDom30 Posted August 30, 2018 Posted August 30, 2018 (edited) So, got so tired and lost so much time and still at beginning of my search..... Any one have experience, how hard is to find real sub/slave women or couple, some one honest and who really enjoy it, like to please, enjoy that..... All my luck was to find liars, people who want to do stuff they only like, not what been told and bed time wankers, still no sign of someone real ... Edited August 30, 2018 by AlexDom30
Fimus Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 If you are only looking for someone to order about, then change your request to just "slave". With a sub it will be more of a "contract" and you will be expected to have care for her/his concerns and desires
Deleted Member Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 3 minutes ago, Fimus said: If you are only looking for someone to order about, then change your request to just "slave". With a sub it will be more of a "contract" and you will be expected to have care for her/his concerns and desires Be it slave or sub there is a responsibility of the Dom to have their safety/needs/desires in mind at all times.
Deleted Member Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 It's something that's said a lot, but looking for any kind of BDSM relationship is not as easy as you might think. You've got to find just the right person/people and just the right dynamic. Keep trying, online and offline and maybe think about refining what you're actually looking for.
BigPolly Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 It depends on your term ‘real’. There are many on here who are subs/slaves but each person plays in their own way & like any relationship/partnership it is down to the individuals to search & find those who match them & their needs. Just because someone’s kinks or needs do not match your own does not mean they are not real. Also are you looking for a sub or a slave & have you made it clear that you are happy to accept either rather than one crossing over into the other? If it is a sub you are looking for then it is not down to you to ‘tell’ a sub what they should do, it is down to communication & limits. If sub hands you her submission that is a gift for you to use as you both see fit, not for you to just take for your own pleasure. If you are continuously having issues maybe you should question your approach, just a thought. The fetish world can take a lot longer to find those who match us well enough to play but those that don’t should never be criticised for playing differently or having different kinks.
Deleted Member Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 I struggle to find a woman who will even reply. It seems I am of little interest to submissives.
BigPolly Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 (edited) Sorry guys there were no replies when I posted mine which means mine now mirrors exactly what you 2 have said. 🙈 Edited August 31, 2018 by BigPolly
Fimus Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 3 minutes ago, BigPolly said: Sorry guys there were no replies when I posted mine which means mine now mirrors exact what you 2 have said. 🙈 Good - needs emphasising :)
BigPolly Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 Also your profile just states that you are looking for kinky women for play & chat etc It doesn’t ask for any kind of submission or that you are looking for what this post has asked for, it just looks like you’re asking for quick hook ups & offering your kik address so on that basis maybe this is why you’re not finding what you’re looking for? Any ‘true’ sub is never going to just hop straight over to your kik until she has got to know you & built up some trust with you. Also there are no photos other than one of your leg so how does anyone know who they’re talking to to be able to build a relationship on....so I think your first impression may actually be your stumbling block rather than trying to find someone ‘real’ with the information that you have offered.
ey**** Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 of course it's possible - but - there is not an instant fix. Your own understand of what you are looking for is a first big step : obviously this will be changeable : but something where you know what you're looking for and know what you can offer so both people can be happy. There aren't really that many women sat around staring at the ceiling going "I wish a complete stranger would come along and tell me to do all of his fetishes for him" - but this seems to be what too many guys seem to imagine. It's going to take time to build up trust, to build up a relationship to make sure their wants are catered for - and you know, dropping everything from a stranger... that's not gonna happen.
Sissy853 Posted August 31, 2018 Posted August 31, 2018 Hi I'm sorry to hear that I'm Mark very submissive up for anything to please
AlexDom30 Posted September 1, 2018 Author Posted September 1, 2018 Well ...... Everything i do i know there are 2 sides od it and both sides have to like it and get to enjoy it, you cant be bull if there is not cuckold couple, or ehibitionist is there isnt voyeur to watch you...... So also in these. What i wanted to say is that i want to take care of my sub/slave but all i found is these: Hi, i am slave, no limits, married, open for everything. Hi slave, i am looking for someone who will do my orders, please me and my needs also by serving me please his needs. Perfect, i am right for that. I dont have limits...... Take your wife panties slave and show me for start..... Ohhhh, sorry i cant do that...... Ok, slave, why dont you do...... Ohhhh sorry i cant do that to. I was thinking i have some toys and when my wife is not at home to play with my ass for you... And thats how it always goes..... Thats why i ask, how hard is to find "real" sub/slave... Someone who like to please his dom/master... Not one who is just looking for quick wank, play with his whole...... Also, about women its same, why i dont write to them while they touch them self.... I am not one who like to write stories so you can cum and leave...... What i want is some one who will dress as i want and tell, do what i want...... Be happy that he is good sub/slave and do what i tell to him, and i see it just as i write at start, if you want to be seen and looket at you you have to pose on place where are people, not private... And about my profile, sorry i am still new here and dont know how these site work, looking to add everything i am and want but still try to find where all i can add....
BigPolly Posted September 1, 2018 Posted September 1, 2018 @AlexDom30 ahhhhh welcome to our world 😁 if this is the problem then welcome to the same thing that we alllllll go through. All you can do is the same as the rest of us do, keep talking to people, hang around making friends & don’t try & rush anything. It might take a while to find what you’re looking for or it may just be around the corner but either way kink-matches are out there. Don’t be deflated by those who get excited by the thought but are scared of the reality or just want quick wank material. Go with a respectful approach & don’t ask something of someone online what you wouldn’t ask in reality when you first meet them. 😊
AlexDom30 Posted September 1, 2018 Author Posted September 1, 2018 @BigPolly lol i am still young, have time to wait! :-D Now serious, well if thats global problem than ok. I was thinking these kinky world works different, but look its same. I had chat with one women these day, and she got offended that i didnt want to write hot story to turn her on to wank before she go to sleep........ So i was thinking maybe i have problem, maybe its normal dom to listen, do orders, and not ask for to kinky, risky task like to wear clothes that turn me on, ....... Ans come on, whats going on with sub/slave people??? Are they turn on in wankers only or to shy to show their side as sub/slave.....
ey**** Posted September 1, 2018 Posted September 1, 2018 got ya - yeah, there are plenty of fantasists - but then plenty who are genuine. Online can be a sea of confusion at times.
Fimus Posted September 1, 2018 Posted September 1, 2018 The problems work both ways. As a sub, I am struggling to find a suitable dom. The simple truth is that the numbers of suitable subs/doms starts small and gets smaller when you factor in such things as distance and ability to accommodate and diminishes to virtually nothing when you allow for the needs and desires of both sides - and the tiny number remaining are all already taken! Or so it seems. The right one will surely be there somewhere
AlexDom30 Posted September 1, 2018 Author Posted September 1, 2018 Dont know aynthing any more lol. Looks like i dont see dom/master sub/slave relationship like others, like just sexual thing. I see it more as someone who enjoy to be pleased by someone other, dont have to be sexual, by touch or what ever. See it as state of mind that please you, not only while fuck or have sex play..... Maybe its hard for me to find it because i look like that, to honest and want to feel more than just quick wank and cum.....
Fimus Posted September 1, 2018 Posted September 1, 2018 The sub-dom relationship is different for every pairing. I want to be told what to wear, to be always available for sex, to be "punished" to varying degrees on a regular basis, to spend time restrained to ensure obedience. Ideally, for me , it would be a 24/7 thing and I would both like to have my kinks explored and help my master/mistress explore their kinks. Not all of that will suit a dom - and some doms will want other things that I could not handle. The truth is that you have to "flatten" your expectations a little. The "pickings" are so slim that you have zero chance of getting precisely what you want, so you will have to compromise on your ideals
ey**** Posted September 1, 2018 Posted September 1, 2018 There's lots to obviously consider. I hate words like real, honest, genuine. Everyone considers themselves to be those things. It's basically what the relationship or whatever looks like *to you* The clearer you can be on this, without seeming to be too pushy ("I am a Dom and looking for a new slave to be my live in partner, cook and cleaner") then you may get fewer, but better replies. Except from men - who don't read profiles anyway or assume rules don't apply to them ;)
BigPolly Posted September 1, 2018 Posted September 1, 2018 9 minutes ago, Fimus said: The sub-dom relationship is different for every pairing. I want to be told what to wear, to be always available for sex, to be "punished" to varying degrees on a regular basis, to spend time restrained to ensure obedience. Ideally, for me , it would be a 24/7 thing and I would both like to have my kinks explored and help my master/mistress explore their kinks. And you see THAT is what makes us all so amazing! We are so wonderfully different yet all uniquely beautiful! For me as a sub I’m happy to be told what to wear if I am turning up for a play session but that’s as far as it goes. Once my session is over I leave & often don’t look back so I won’t be on call for sex/play again unless I decide that’s someone I’d like to play with again. There is noway I could hand my control over to anyone 24/7 so for that I salute you @Fimus and that shows you @AlexDom30 how different we all are so please don’t question whether what you want in a D/s is right or wrong, it’s a case of ‘you know what’s right for you & therefore you just need to find others that match that’ I personally don’t agree that you need to ‘flatten’ your expectations, why accept anything less than something that is going to bring you the best pleasure just to suit others. It’s simply a case of patience & ‘just keep looking’
BigPolly Posted September 1, 2018 Posted September 1, 2018 11 minutes ago, eyemblacksheep said: Except from men - who don't read profiles anyway or assume rules don't apply to them ;) 😂😂 This!!! 👆😂😂 BOOM! 😁
AlexDom30 Posted September 1, 2018 Author Posted September 1, 2018 I like to find some one who will wear what i want lol but no one :-( , try it with women, try it with brave husbands who like to buy stuff for theirs wifes but all run away like i ask so much, so weird things......
ey**** Posted September 1, 2018 Posted September 1, 2018 ultimately, everyone just wants their needs and wants met - though - a lot just isn't compatible
ey**** Posted September 1, 2018 Posted September 1, 2018 as a kinda further thought. A lot gets brought up on threads here and there about instant gratification. So, as you say, what you get in the example scenario above is a guy whom, on his terms, wants to be able to come on line "when his wife isn't there" and act out his kinks. But likewise - you've brought up having people do things for you fairly quick/instantly in the conversation - even though it seemed to be what the other person wanted, you'd do no real forvetting for compatibility.
AlexDom30 Posted September 1, 2018 Author Posted September 1, 2018 @eyemblacksheep sorry you didnt understand ahat i wanted to say. I dont mind people want theirs play, or what ever, and i dont espect them to do it just after second message but what i hate the most are liers and fake people. When you or i message you i introduce my self, tell what i am into and what i am looking so you know from start what things i want dont waste my and your time to introduce ourself for some days and when i ask and want to start our play with light task you start things like i write, if you are not what i am looking and i am not guy that you look no need to lie to get fast wank..... Dont say you are something that u arnt and i have problem with that..... Not with your needs and things you want but with things you lie and say you are.
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