SH**** Posted November 18, 2022 Posted November 18, 2022 Just now, Soraiyaprincess said: Im curious- do you mean you don't yourself need aftercare? Or you don't provide aftercare for any subs you play with? And my second question is why? 😊 I do not provide aftercare for her at all bcuz I am all about my pleasure and wat I want 🤷🏻♂️🤷🏻♂️🤷🏻♂️
So**** Posted November 18, 2022 Posted November 18, 2022 3 minutes ago, SHONDARBY said: I do not provide aftercare for her at all bcuz I am all about my pleasure and wat I want 🤷🏻♂️🤷🏻♂️🤷🏻♂️ Oooo right okay... 👌🏽
SH**** Posted November 18, 2022 Posted November 18, 2022 6 minutes ago, Soraiyaprincess said: Oooo right okay... 👌🏽 I wont judge U for wat U want I hope U wont judge me behind wat I want
So**** Posted November 18, 2022 Posted November 18, 2022 1 minute ago, SHONDARBY said: I wont judge U for wat U want I hope U wont judge me behind wat I want I literally just acknowledged your reply, I wasn't being rude.
SH**** Posted November 18, 2022 Posted November 18, 2022 5 minutes ago, Soraiyaprincess said: I literally just acknowledged your reply, I wasn't being rude. Lmao I aint say U were being rude bby
Deleted Member Posted November 18, 2022 Posted November 18, 2022 For me aftercare is cuddles with the tv on. A cuppa tea talking about the highs and lows of the scene and brush my hair or help me shower and dressed. With sweets/ice cream for a bonus!
Je**** Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 I've never needed aftercare, I've never finished a BDSM session as sub and felt anything other than happiness 😂😂, as a Dom though I've gave aftercare (mostly DDLG related) Juice bottle, Cuddles and positive rein***ment was always a solid go too
Foxenkit Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 For me it really depends on who I'm playing with. Such as one pair I play with do not do aftercare, so I generally don't do aftercare after scenes with them. I just cuddle something soft and ride out the good feelys and touch base a day or two later. But someone else I've played with needed aftercare as a dom, so we broke out the snuggly blankets and cuddles and chatted and I reassured them that I was indeed okay and that the scene went well. And a few days later we checked in with each other and touched base. As a whole, I can do without but I do actually sometimes wish for a bit of physical touching after a scene.
Da**** Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 Ok first off aftercare should be required for any kind of BDSM play. It all depends on what we do to be honest for me.
Deleted Member Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 There are both mental and physical effects to be mindful of after a “ scene” or session. Particularly if the session has pushed mental/ physical boundaries. *** pressure can drop quite significantly in the “ receiver”. That’s why I touch and keep in physical contact . Your sub may start to sweat, skin moist, cold clammy- clues as to when you need to stop the play . it’s important to agree beforehand what aftercare for the individual looks like.. Water brings the *** pressure back up , sugar - chocolate- biscuit.. a warm blanket as the client / sub/ receiver could come back from the ‘ high’ and feel cold and need comfort . Those in subsoace wil need monitoring . And a caring Domme will wish to check in a couple of days later as some subs crash or hit a low point ( a come down ) Please feel free to comment
Gi**** Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 What is subspace? I've never experienced pre agreed play. I didn't know "aftercare" was a thing till i joined this a few months ago. Love n light x
th**** Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 17 hours ago, SHONDARBY said: Lmao I aint say U were being rude bby I’ll say you are being rude if she won’t. You seem like exactly the kind of ignorant uninformed poser dom with no understanding of power dynamics nor the responsibilities of being a dom. People who behave in the way that you purporting to are what gives kink a bad name. Clueless and unpleasant. “all about my pleasure and wat I want” is one of the most pathetic things I think I’ve ever read on these boards. People like you are a legitimate danger to the mental and physical health of the people unfortunate enough to agree to play with you. Disgusting
DarkArts1066 Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 Aftercare should be a ‘rebalancing’ for both sub and Dom. It should be discussed freely and in depth before any session, and although it is usually the responsibility of the Dom to pay attention to the subs’ needs and behaviours after a session, and act accordingly, something that is frequently overlooked is ‘Dom drop’. Yes - that is a thing !! …… but maybe that is for a different thread.
SH**** Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 2 hours ago, thegentlemandom said: I’ll say you are being rude if she won’t. You seem like exactly the kind of ignorant uninformed poser dom with no understanding of power dynamics nor the responsibilities of being a dom. People who behave in the way that you purporting to are what gives kink a bad name. Clueless and unpleasant. “all about my pleasure and wat I want” is one of the most pathetic things I think I’ve ever read on these boards. People like you are a legitimate danger to the mental and physical health of the people unfortunate enough to agree to play with you. Disgusting Dont be A simp bro I dont have to show aftercare and ur the fake Dom here if U are focused on her needs
So**** Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 2 hours ago, thegentlemandom said: I’ll say you are being rude if she won’t. You seem like exactly the kind of ignorant uninformed poser dom with no understanding of power dynamics nor the responsibilities of being a dom.... Honestly, you won't get though to someone like that, 'tis best to block and move on... 😅 he won't get very far in a community like this with an attitude like that xx
SH**** Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 1 minute ago, Soraiyaprincess said: Honestly, you won't get though to someone like that, 'tis best to block and move on... 😅 he won't get very far in a community like this with an attitude like that xx Ive gotten very far actually and if itz criminal to focus on my needs I guess I broke the Dom/Sub rules 😂😂🤣🤣
sh**** Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 It's all about the cuddles!! Chill, get some food, watch TV. Sleep!! Knowing that my Dom is close by 🥰
MrJim Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 I like to just hold her close and be there to reassure her that I care about her. I like touching so it’s not a stretch to go into aftercare, it all depends on what we did before hand. After a punishment I will gently rub lotion on her, after daily discipline she is not in need of anything. After a rope scene I make sure she is physically ok and again hold her close.
Ka**** Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 Yeah. I guess they are people who don’t realize the difference between being dominant and supportive and oppressive and uncaring.
Ka**** Posted November 19, 2022 Posted November 19, 2022 Being a dom is about expressing a powering security for me. It incorporates mutual trust, respect for each persons role, and the understanding you will benefit from one another to fulfill a role.
Submarkg Posted November 20, 2022 Posted November 20, 2022 11 hours ago, LadyRedDomme said: There are both mental and physical effects to be mindful of after a “ scene” or session. Particularly if the session has pushed mental/ physical boundaries. *** pressure can drop quite significantly in the “ receiver”. That’s why I touch and keep in physical contact . Your sub may start to sweat, skin moist, cold clammy- clues as to when you need to stop the play . it’s important to agree beforehand what aftercare for the individual looks like.. Water brings the *** pressure back up , sugar - chocolate- biscuit.. a warm blanket as the client / sub/ receiver could come back from the ‘ high’ and feel cold and need comfort . Those in subsoace wil need monitoring . And a caring Domme will wish to check in a couple of days later as some subs crash or hit a low point ( a come down ) Please feel free to comment You never fail to amaze me …Honestly that is an amazing insight into as you call it a session and the after affects physical and emotional …
Deleted Member Posted November 26, 2022 Posted November 26, 2022 Cuddling kissing watching a movie sometimes and naps
wh**** Posted December 4, 2022 Posted December 4, 2022 Cuddling. Sweet kisses (especially forehead), bringing me something to drink or maybe eat, all of the rubs. Basically just show me you love me
no**** Posted December 11, 2022 Posted December 11, 2022 Shondarby sounds like he full of shit and definitely a selfish person if he is lucky enough to find anyone
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