Age is a preference

[Da****]

2 hours ago, CopperKnob said:

Maybe repulsed wasn't the best choice of words but do you know what is repulsive, for me?
Individuals who are unable to respect other peoples preferences, boundaries, limits and resort to unnecessary namecalling.

I was a bit of a harsh d**k. You’re entitled. It was just an open forum. But yes the young are more in tune with it all and old f**ks just grew up in another time and still shaking bad habits. I get it.

[ey****]

I think perhaps the above comments can explain why there is often a generation difference which can sometimes lead to others preferences 

[ED****]

I readily agree despite my age, choice of consent is prime! Well expressed x

[do****]

I see it this way they have their own preference in things so why does it matter if you do as well? Continue doing what you're doing bud you're not in the wrong no need to explain to anyone why you have it set that way.

[MM****]

I have this problem. I’m 39 this month but I don’t look it. I have 20 year olds coming on to me all the time. I have to tell them they are too young and I won’t have much in common with them

[gr****]

I dont believe age is a number the young ppl are freaks especially gay i like that but i dont like young where they could be my son. So the age for me older or lower is a problem

[Deleted Member]

Yeah it’s important to have something you can both relate to besides kink if the relationship is only about kink it burns out….imho

[Deleted Member]

Age plays a factor in being able to have some interests besides kink

[ar****]

People have preferences. It’s fine. Nobody should shame you for having them. Some need to stay in the fantasy/roleplay realm for ethical and legal reasons. Other than that, It’s also not about labels or glass ceilings or barriers or racism. It’s just what gets the person there, no more no less.

[Deleted Member]

Perfectly valid as long as everyone is legal

[Je****]

I’m in my mid fifties and I wish I would vibe with someone in their late 30’s / early 40’s but for some reason I see to attract and vibe with late 20 year olds. I’m told it’s because I’m more secure to be around , not clingy, not judgmental, not a brat, and can take a good session without tapping out. My fetish is trampling and shoe/foot worship so having someone stand on my face with their shoes on is pretty common as an example. Younger partners seem more open to trying that with me .

[lo****]

Cuz it's a letdown with you saying they're either too old or too young and they were trying to get at you that's the reason why they don't have a chance

[ge****]

2 hours ago, louisville679 said:

Cuz it's a letdown with you saying they're either too old or too young and they were trying to get at you that's the reason why they don't have a chance

It's not a letdown in the slightest - if the person concerned had their expectations set correctly anyway - it's no different from being told you are too tall or short, or have the wrong colour hair, or your personality doesn't match or any number of other preferences someone might express and use as a reason to decide you're not a good match for them.
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If people accepted that they won't be for everyone things would be a lot more harmonious for all concerned.

[Deleted Member]

8 hours ago, louisville679 said:

Cuz it's a letdown with you saying they're either too old or too young and they were trying to get at you that's the reason why they don't have a chance

I’m confused with what you’re saying! They are messaging already knowing I have an age preference and feel let down and therefore still feel the need to message?

[Je****]

Great Topic … I’m in my 50’s as well and would like to connect with someone who is between the ages of 35 to 45 because I really need both physical and psychological domination without a lot of coaching. Instead and I know many of you won’t get this and dismiss my feeling , I keep getting 19 to 27 year old women who are mostly into physical domination and often tend to revert to venting their own drama and issues on me. I am always happy to be an outlet for a goddess but we never seem to get to my psychological needs.

[Epicpotato]

I prefer older. Most of my past partners have been younger.and it didn't work out. Not sure if that's an age thing or that they where vanilla and I am very much mint chocolate chip with fudge swirl.

[Deleted Member]

To me it's a face and personality I'm attracted to, while bearing in mind a woman's behaviour. That's why I prefer to meet quickly to suss her out in person to see if we click. Long chats on cyber is soooo boring and can be full of lies.

[Ae****]

Some people can't handle rejection. Rejection is very hard to take, if you aren't blessed with the right mind set.
Be patient, spare a thought for them, and just accept that this is part of life. Be kind and firm, and don't worry about it beyond that.

[Deleted Member]

Sunday at 06:24 PM, Epicpotato said:

I prefer older. Most of my past partners have been younger.and it didn't work out. Not sure if that's an age thing or that they where vanilla and I am very much mint chocolate chip with fudge swirl.

Well said young lady!!

[Epicpotato]

On 10/24/2022 at 6:10 PM, SentientMe said:

To me it's a face and personality I'm attracted to, while bearing in mind a woman's behaviour. That's why I prefer to meet quickly to suss her out in person to see if we click. Long chats on cyber is soooo boring and can be full of lies.

A face will always get you in the door but your personality is what will keep it open or closed for me. I think of long chats as a way of susing out if they are actually interested or not. Or just playing the long game. But I see your point.

[ro****]

I often get similar messages/responses.
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My rejection texts are as kind and placating as I know how to make them, thanking them for their interest, wishing them all the best with their search (even though really I need not thank them for sometimes being predatory but I give the benefit of the doubt knowing (hoping) most are probably not.) I try to be courteous and treat everyone respectfully.
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To literally cut and paste:
"Hey, thank you so much for your interest, but the age gap is a little too much for my comfort. I wish you the best of luck with your search."
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About 50 percent of the time they become become angry and call me a slut, a whore, close minded, too inexperienced to know better, or to "get off my high horse". At that point I just block.
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For me, the hesitancy about large age gaps comes from power imbalances arising from relative experience. I'm not even talking kinky experience, but life experience.
As an 18 year old you are so fresh into the adult world, with so many wonderful things yet to learn. You are impressionable, dare I say manipulatable.
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Even for me, at 22 years of age, I very rarely connect with sometime 18/19 years old as I'm aware of unintentional influences and wanting to give them the opportunity to experience this world for themselves.
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Sometime 20 years my senior has twice the life experience as me. Looking at 'adult' life (using '' as we mature at different ages, not necessarily at 18) I have '4' years practice. They are 5 times more experienced at navigating the adult world than me.
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I'm not comfortable with that, with all the things I don't know that they do. That they could potentially exploit. Sure, it's a bit of a depressing world view but it's a safe one (and sometimes realistic)
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Even outside of kink, in 'regular' relationships I've met my fair share of young individuals married to older partners, and in many many circumstances they benefit from the impressionability and control. It creates dependency, the inability to leave for lack of independent function (emotionally, financially, and other) and you're too young to see unhealthy traits.
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(Note, it can go the other way, although I think often differently. Maybe it's financial benefit, appeal to a Dom's experience. I just think it's more common to be the reverse, although I'm still young and cannot comment so much on the matter as I haven't experienced it).
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I think a little bit of it is also cultural, where even from the same society you might appreciate different shows, activities etc. You might also want someone at a more comparable life stage so you can go through things together.
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For me physical attraction also plays a role. I find I'm more likely to find someone physically appealing who is my own age (my attraction ages with me)
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As you get older and life experience expands I think it's common for that age gap to increase yet still be healthy, as experience is all relative. But I still entirely understand having boundaries in place, encourage it.
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I think alot of the time their response
does come down to inability to accept rejection, not that it excuses it. Regardless of the motivation behind the response, it's still not kind or all that acceptable and it makes me glad to have blocked them.

[ch****]

Any preference is fine. It’s a preference, not statement on someone else’s worth. I’m sure I’ve been rejected many times over to to both my age and probably things I’ve never even considered. No one can *** you to be into someone you’re just not in to and I certainly wouldn’t be comfortable being with someone who did t want to be with me.

[Deleted Member]

I never saw age as a problem. I get a lot of stick for this. The backlashing I got when I once told this on Reddit. 😱 Obviously only when I say I'm open to date a 20-sth. Nevertheless there are dozens of public figures that have that kind of relationship. I have had great connections with 20-sth girls. It all depends on the mental phase they/we are in. Also so many people that on a platform such as reddit it's for banter. If I flirt (try to) with a younger unknown person online (mostly US), the chances to actually meet and be serious about it are nill. (As I'm from Belgium). You never had some playful banter with someone much older? (Like a granny you helped in the store, or cashier?)

[lu****]

I’m 25 and my bf is 54 . I see nothing wrong with this but a lot of people do . Why ?

[Deleted Member]

Nothing wrong with it! Just different people have different preferences. However, some people don’t like when you tell them they are too young etc.