Majority after kinky sexual experiences?

[Ca****]

Same here!

[Deleted Member]

I’m not on a kink/fetish app to make life long friends 😂

[pa****]

There’s still some real ones out there 😏

[qu****]

1 hour ago, O-Polanco said:

I don't know, I think most social media, especially ones like this, often get over saturated with horny people looking for quick now fun. Then you get bots trying to get you to sign up for their website. I don't mind a straight forward, "this is what I want" message, but I also get that it gets tiring when that's all you get

Precisely! I truly find it an absolute turn off, disrespectful and distasteful. Discuss what you are looking for or interested in…see if you vibe…I’m truly starting to think that a lot of the “subs” on here are horny males wanting a few exciting messages to get off on.

[qu****]

35 minutes ago, Christian1997 said:

Try going to real life kinky meets. People are usually more decent there

That might have to be an option.

[qu****]

44 minutes ago, Cheekysub247 said:

Its very common, and on most sites.
About 95% of messages i get just contain a sexual fantasy the guy wants, reguardless of what my profile says.
I always get to know someone first, and if they dont put that effort in then its a no go for me.

I don’t think they even read the profiles now. There’s also the copy and paste message that you can tell has been sent to loads of people.

[pi****]

There are also a lot of people on here or other sites that just want you to get to the point. As man you only have a couple of sentences to catch some ones eye. At least these people are getting to the point. I have dealt with so many people that small chat you up then try and scam you. Sometimes better to fail fast

[qu****]

47 minutes ago, Diggz said:

I can say as a guy on a dating app it feels like there are legions of us often all vying for a lot less women. There can be a sense of trying to get to the point and stand out. If you know the woman has literally hundreds or thousands of messages in her inbox, writing out a massive introduction gets exhausting after a while. Most are never seen. So you end up just cutting to the chase for better or worse. But doesn’t mean we don’t want those other aspects too.

I personally prefer the long message with effort and detail over the short blunt distasteful messages I receive.

[no****]

My 2 cents can it be the name queen domee that makes them go right to business, I would not start off that way maybe some guys see domme and assume it's straight to vulgar stuff...

[no****]

And why no profile pics !!!! I don't get it, do you plan on never meeting another human face to face?

[ra****]

I would never let someone peg or Dom me that I did not trust or respect.

[or****]

Most of the messages I've sent will be my attempt at conversational, maybe referencing something kinky from the profile, but mostly "hey, how are you?" to try and get some conversation going. Feeling like there's some vibe is really nice before we get to obeying orders and inflicting ***. Most of those messages don't get a response. I'm thinking maybe the messages you're getting are from people with experiences similar to mine and just trying a more aggressive sales pitch.

[ro****]

That's pretty much my experience.

[Deleted Member]

You’d be amazed how great at gate keeping the phrase “you must be emotionally available” is 😁

[Rsbswth]

Yeah that's not my bag 😅 I'd much rather an actual conversation, I don't want to just launch into the sexual stuff straight off, I'd much rather build to that a bit

[Deleted Member]

I'd much prefer to know someone first before getting into the kinky side of things as I'm here to date, but seems chit chat doesn't really get replies unfortunately x

[Deleted Member]

No, I don't agree, in my opinion its a waste of time writing a unique and informative message, because most of the time people just ignore them and don't respond at all and if they do they think that you are not real. Believe me I go through that all the time. Even though I always read the entire profiles and mention things from their profiles before sending a message, but yet for some reason they still don't respond or if they do they think that I am no real. So it doesn't really matter what someone writes it's all depends on the mood, attitude and character of the person you are writing to.

[TxFrank]

Some of us are looking for play partners, not lovers. I don't require a deep emotional connection for bdsm play. It's an activity that you can keep separate from love interests.
That said, being approached by "do me" subs and Dominants is tiresome. I want to know your interests, your limits, and experience. If they're not compatible with mine, we won't be going any further. Most of these can be sorted quickly luckily. It would make for very boring dungeon parties if people couldn't find and negotiate with another player for a mutually beneficial kinkexperience.
A final thing to consider is that there are a lot of kink activities that are not sexual. Impact play, bondage, sensation and electrical play have nothing to do with sex. Personally, I don't want sexual activities with my bdsm.

[iw****]

This tho, say it louder for the people in back. Because like genuinely friendly people get lost in the mix and I cant say I blame them from some of the shit I've heard 🤣

[St****]

I have found that this is becoming more typical behavior in my limited experience over the past 26 years in this lifestyle. Having or not not having boundaries is a personal decision and is why I developed a set of rules not only for my self but for prospective slaves and subs. Check boxes as they are can be useful in weather or not while interviewing a potential sub or dom is what I’d like to consider in the reigns of assessing or determining if a potential match is going to happen and not today. I’m not shaming anyone here and this is my own style, course and opinion.

A friendly reminder is to always ask questions and listen to our gut instinct and keep it sane, safe and consensual. The more informed we are the better chances of undesirable consequences in any given scenario.

On topic: What is key is weeding out “thirsty” which may lead to emotional damage in the least and potentially dangerous situations in my humble opinion.

[Sk****]

I have to say, I’ve met a few guys off of this site. One is just beautiful. I’m a switch new to Domming. He’s young and experienced as a sub to some degree (much more than what I expected!). He’s sweet and shy and not what I’d call a femboy or a sissy. He’s certainly masculine in a lot of ways, which I absolutely love, but very shy, which makes for an amazing time (at least from my perspective as well as his).

We’ve shared 3 scenes together, each escalating a little further. When we’ve gotten together, we’ve conversed and enjoyed casual time. Enough to find a level of both comfort and attraction. I honestly can’t complain. At least not about him or another guy I’ve only met for lunch, but experienced decent chemistry with.

Yes. There have been a fair share of guys that I’ve turned down and visa versa. It is what it is and everyone is free to decline someone who approaches any dynamic distastefully. There are a lot of people I’d consider rather vanilla and just looking for sex on this app. People want sex. This app affords that in all shapes and forms. We still have to vette. Sometimes I feel like I’m conducting a job interview (which honestly doesn’t bother me, btw). I know my kinks and what I want. I certainly want to cut to the chase and figure out if our kinks are compatible before spending time investing in the person. My time is valuable, and I know what I’m looking for. I’m goal-directed in that way. All of the other details can be worked out once compatibility is established. If they suck as a person, I honestly don’t care how sexually/kinkily compatible we are, and usually, by engaging in discussions about our compatibility, I can also get a glimpse of the type of person that are and can derive compatibility from there based on communication, writing tone, patterns of speech, grammar, degree of listening and recollecting what I’ve shared with them, fluidity of conversation, degrees of controlling behavior, criticism, disrespectfulness, etc.

All in all, it’s a dating app. We have to vette to find what we’re looking for. Diligence and responsibility is absolutely necessary if we want to find a compatible partner. Yeah. The process can be daunting, but it’s necessary. I really don’t find much of a difference between here and irl. The only thing about here is that people are more willing to be authentic about their character and creepiness right out of the starting gate than they are irl, so in the grand scheme of things, there’s an up-side! 😂

Just keep swimming!

[ja****]

That come after you show what you can offer. It’s not match  com

[ge****]

The problem is that a large majority of men (and yes shamefully it *is* mostly men) see "sex site" on sites like this one, and immediately think their wildest fantasies will be lived out, and lose sight of reality and the "norms" of attraction, connection, chemistry, respect and consideration etc and start thinking with their small brain rather than their big one.
.
They think because it's a sex site that's all anyone is looking for and that it will be readily on tap - so they send messages full of those wild fantasies (most of which have been derived from porn) in the vain hope of having them fulfilled, forgetting that on the other side is a person, a person who may have their own wants and needs, a person who has the right to say no, and the right to expect respect and consideration and more, and who needs attraction and connection etc.
.
Sadly it will always be thus - the only positive is guys that have that attitude are easy to spot and rule out - though seeing the wood for the trees can be tricky at times.

[An****]

8 hours ago, queendomme said:

Maybe it’s just me but the majority of messages I get are from “submissive” men saying they want to be pegged, punished or trampled on. I just find it so weird and uncomfortable…are most after kinky experiences? Does no one want to get to know someone and vibe without that sexual side first? Is getting to know someone no longer important?

I just had a good convo with a female dom. without bringing up anything explicit or asking each other for anything. It was very satisfying to me. I also get a lot of people im my inbox that dont even ask how i am before telling me they want me to do this or that. Its such a turnoff. I do occasionally have some luck and get a message from a gentlemen/lady and it honestly goes a long way. I dont usually send messages first but I would never be so disrespectful!! Im sorry you have to deal with that.

If you ever just want to shoot the breeze my inbox is open!!

[CopperKnob]

7 hours ago, Diggz said:

I can say as a guy on a dating app it feels like there are legions of us often all vying for a lot less women. There can be a sense of trying to get to the point and stand out. If you know the woman has literally hundreds or thousands of messages in her inbox, writing out a massive introduction gets exhausting after a while. Most are never seen. So you end up just cutting to the chase for better or worse. But doesn’t mean we don’t want those other aspects too.

There is no shortage of women. We make up half the population. We're literally everywhere