New to all this...

[MrsSynn]

So, my Husband/Dom and I are new to the scene. I've researched so much about being a sub, but not enough about Doms. I'm not sure how he should act or anything. He has a bit of an idea, but I know more information will help him a lot. Is there anything about etiquette, punishment, etc. Anything you guys might have to offer him to help him on his journey?

 

Anything is much appreciated!

[Deleted Member]

This might not sound like the most helpful of advice...but he needs to find his own way. Every single Dominant I've met has a very different approach and that's the beauty of BDSM. 

Generally, though, if there's specific questions about certain aspects of BDSM (so use of implements, types of punishment/funishment, restraint ideas etc etc) you're best asking specific questions to get answers. It's hard for anyone to tell another person how to be dominant...does that make sense?

[Gina47]

Well said, Victoria.

[ey****]

neither of you need to act in a text book way.  This is your relationship to define on your rules.  It may be worth some googles of things like 'BDSM protocols' and seeing if there's anything in there that is "you"

And if something doesn't feel "right" you don't have to do it.   

[Deleted Member]

Dominant guide.com

[Ni****]

Every dom is as different as every sub & the fun is in finding out how much control / domination you both want. Take time, talk, talk & talk more & enjoy !

[MistressMettle]

I always post this in response to new kinksters I swear I'm not paid to! but Morgan Thorne's beginners BDSM guide is really helpful for anyone wanting some advice and ideas of where to start. I think going through a list of BDSM activities and rating what you'd like to try, not keen on and hard against is helpful. You can then see each others thoughts and get an idea of activities to try out. There's no right way to Dom as long it's safe and consensual. It's sometimes easier to start with games as it doesn't seem as serious. For instance choose a treat and a punishment then play higher or lower with a pack of a cards. If you're right sub gets treat if your wrong sub gets punished. It sets the mood and breaks the ice.

[MistressMettle]

Also if he wants more advice feel free to message me. 

[MrsSynn]

Thank you everyone. I will try all these tips out. I've also thought about maybe going to munches or a play event in my area, but I'm not sure just yet in how to approach him about it. Maybe him seeing how its done or being able to talk to other Doms might help.

@MistressMettle Thank you! I will talk to him and see what questions he may have or see if he wants to message you himself.

Either way, thank you all for the advice!

[ey****]

we started a lot with other munches and events.   

A way to approach could simply be "there's this munch or this event - do you think it's worth going as a means to see how other people do things" 

it helped a lot for me learning a lot about actual dynamics rather than necessarily text book and how bespoke relationships can be - and of course as well as being a means to find what might be for you - can also be a way to find out what definitely isn't for you.

I learnt a lot by watching through playing also - but, it's "a way" - it's a resource and it's not essential to use all resources.

[MrsSynn]

Thank you, @eyemblacksheep. I'll try that approach with him.