Am I wrong to be annoyed?

[sm****]

He's setting off red alerts left right an centre there, you have already seen these otherwise you would not have voiced your concerns looking for opinions, always listen to that inner voice of yours. 

You also done the right thing by asking others and being new to the kink scene needing to find out how things roll etc  never be afraid to ask.

If i was in this situation i would have no hesitation in jumping ship, you have to look after no1 yourself first.

[Ov****]

Ok to set a record straight as he has said I didn’t find out he told me who he was.

[Se****]

Hi, I’m so sorry you’ve gone through this. Meeting new people can be strange and daunting at the best of times without adding in manipulation. 

Honestly, you have every right to be angry/mad. But use that energy to walk away from this situation. 

There are lots of things you’ve said that are highly concerning to me and would make me run a mile. Asking the deceit into the mix just makes things even more scary. 

Him remaining “anonymous” during calls/video - red flag. 

ANY pressure to meet - red flag. 

Dishonesty - red flag. 

Also, if he was so desperate to meet why was he remaining anonymous on the calls. None of it adds up to him being someone you can trust. 

Take care and be safe x

[Mainecpl]

Always trust your gut. People that are pushy and/or deceptive could be dangerous, don’t take risks with people you don’t know. Set your boundaries and stick to them

[in****]

No I would be annoyed. This is duplicitous. If you're not interested and they come back trying to be someone else that's creepy af

[Deleted Member]

You should be annoyed at any deception practiced on you and you’ve been played. Why else would someone be using two accounts. Otherwise, I should be doing the same, but I’m not into playing people. But, that’s only my opinion. Everyone should be able to just be themselves in one account!

[QXX666]

21 minutes ago, FatefulDestiny said:

Hi, I’m so sorry you’ve gone through this. Meeting new people can be strange and daunting at the best of times without adding in manipulation. 

Honestly, you have every right to be angry/mad. But use that energy to walk away from this situation. 

There are lots of things you’ve said that are highly concerning to me and would make me run a mile. Asking the deceit into the mix just makes things even more scary. 

Him remaining “anonymous” during calls/video - red flag. 

ANY pressure to meet - red flag. 

Dishonesty - red flag. 

Also, if he was so desperate to meet why was he remaining anonymous on the calls. None of it adds up to him being someone you can trust. 

Take care and be safe x

Some people are into anon relationship/kink/fetish so it’s not always red flag… and we all are anonymous during the first comms? Unless you give your identity every time you speak with someone on here? 

[QXX666]

52 minutes ago, OverlordSub said:

Ok to set a record straight as he has said I didn’t find out he told me who he was.

Sound you are still talking to him and ready to pardon him? 

[Ov****]

17 minutes ago, QXX666 said:

Some people are into anon relationship/kink/fetish so it’s not always red flag… and we all are anonymous during the first comms? Unless you give your identity every time you speak with someone on here? 

Yes anon wasn’t the issue

[Deleted Member]

All of this is a hell no for me. Annoyed? That’s being quite nice. Time to block.

[lo****]

1 hour ago, OverlordSub said:

Ok to set a record straight as he has said I didn’t find out he told me who he was.

So? What he did was still deceptive and wrong. It's obv he has seen this post and is taking issue with his behavior being called out.
Just because he eventually came clean does NOT CHANGE the fact his behavior was wrong.

[Se****]

47 minutes ago, QXX666 said:

Some people are into anon relationship/kink/fetish so it’s not always red flag… and we all are anonymous during the first comms? Unless you give your identity every time you speak with someone on here? 

I stand corrected

[Se****]

33 minutes ago, OverlordSub said:

Yes anon wasn’t the issue

My apologies. I misunderstood. 

[Du****]

They are red flags. In a BDSM dynamic honesty and consent are foremost. Unless you have given consent and discussed for any actions ahead of time it’s non consensual.

[Deleted Member]

You have a good positive attitude, and not wrong to be annoyed. Being annoyed is very kind of you, because you should be more on the ***ed side. I am a Switch, and these type of people give us a bad rep. You don't need two accounts to show both sides. He is bad news. If I were you, start running!

[Ov****]

30 minutes ago, FatefulDestiny said:

My apologies. I misunderstood. 

No worries was a bit going on in my post and we all have what we are comfortable with

[jh****]

Sounds sketchy.... I would block 🚫 red flags

[Ov****]

20 minutes ago, kiseu said:

You have a good positive attitude, and not wrong to be annoyed. Being annoyed is very kind of you, because you should be more on the ***ed side. I am a Switch, and these type of people give us a bad rep. You don't need two accounts to show both sides. He is bad news. If I were you, start running!

I am only annoyed, not so much when it happened but today it’s easier to step back and look with fresh eyes. The annoyance is because his approach as a dom I really enjoyed and was fun and easy, he was considerate, fun and listened. To then have him tell me he is actually someone else and well yeah you may get where I am coming from. It’s a little gutting to think something good could happen and then have that basically thrown at you. Hey ho things happen we learn and grow.

[McGraw]

He sounds like the kink equivalent of a sleazy door to door salesman. I know when I’ve been open to a D/S setup regardless of who takes what role I’ve said so early doors and not suggested role reversal after my initial pitch had been rebuffed. FWIW it says on my profile I am a switch so the 2 profiles schtick holds no water with me.

[Ov****]

13 minutes ago, McGraw said:

He sounds like the kink equivalent of a sleazy door to door salesman. I know when I’ve been open to a D/S setup regardless of who takes what role I’ve said so early doors and not suggested role reversal after my initial pitch had been rebuffed. FWIW it says on my profile I am a switch so the 2 profiles schtick holds no water with me.

When he came as sub he did say he is switch I just didn’t think that was going to happen

[Deleted Member]

43 minutes ago, OverlordSub said:

I am only annoyed, not so much when it happened but today it’s easier to step back and look with fresh eyes. The annoyance is because his approach as a dom I really enjoyed and was fun and easy, he was considerate, fun and listened. To then have him tell me he is actually someone else and well yeah you may get where I am coming from. It’s a little gutting to think something good could happen and then have that basically thrown at you. Hey ho things happen we learn and grow.

How about this... same blah, blah, blah. Off this site, he accidentally sends the picture from this other profile, then ghosts me. After time passes, has the nerve to check my profile. I blocked him.😅 I know what you went through.💖

Edited December 20, 2022 by Deleted Member
Wrote it wrong.

[Ov****]

37 minutes ago, kiseu said:

How about this... same blah, blah, blah. Off this site, he accidentally sends the picture from this other profile, then ghosts me. After time passes, has the nerve to check my profile. I blocked him.😅 I know what you went through.💖

Really sorry to hear that!

[Deleted Member]

All kink aside he just sounds like someone you don’t want to deal with.

[LostBabyGirl]

I wouldn't be annoyed, I'd be ***** fuming! Unless I've misunderstood.... he came to you as a sub then cos that didn't work changed it (and set up a new profile) to a dom, which is clear, premeditated deceit.
He got knocked back and then went out of his way to try again, essentially as a different person. Nah! That's bang out of order.
I'm sorry you had this experience, love. Personally I'd tell him where to shove his profiles and suggest he takes a long, hard look at his behaviour.

[CopperKnob]

I think that we all have our comfort zones and it was early days in your chat
But honestly, i have the following point
It's against the TOU's to have two accts here (if in fact it was here)
It appears that they've intentionally deceived you
It appears that they've used that deception to 'manipulate' you in to doing something that you may not have done so readily (maybe, maybe not)
I know that you've offered some clarification in comments but ultimately they've not been honest with you as to who they are. My gut is that they've wanted some cybersex and they were prepared to get it any way they could. Maybe i'm wrong, none of us know the ins and outs.
.
I will say this from my own experience. I was chatting to someone here maybe 2yrs ago now. I was new and it was all too overwhelming. I explained my thoughts and closed my acct.
A few months later I returned. He contacted me. Within the first few messages i explained that we had previously spoken at length. Because that's what i would hope most people would do.