Need advice

[Anonimasigilosa2022]

I'm 31 married, from Brazil. I've been married for two years now, but we are together for ten years, I really Love bdsm, my husband stays away for long periods and i really use porn as a relief valve and bdsm is my favorite Kind. While He is here i try to put in practice some action and He kinda likes a little bit, but the real Hard part He doesn't seem to appreciate so much. I want to be strapped and used like a bitch (yeah, yeah, I'm horny writing this), be cuffed on my knees while he spanks me while I fake that I'll not suck him and after some slaps I give him a bj that explodes cum on my face. Sometimes I want to be with him and someone else, being fucked by one and sucking the other, while they *** me (r*pe fetish too, judge me, you will never know me anyway). These are just some examples, I didn't even got to the deep stuff. I tried to introduce him, but he is a really sweet, kind man, that is afraid to hurt me, while I want him to spank me and "r*pe me". I know that he loves me, he is put some effort because I workout a lot and i like a man in a good shape🔥 and he was getting a bit chubby, he now he is striving, he is working out a lot even in the days away (he works in a ship). Now when he comes back I have fore and desire, but he is still too vanilla.  How can I make him to understand without shock him?

[ge****]

Simple answer is you can't "make" him do anything he isn't comfortable with.
.
What you can do is sit him down and explain to him why this means so much to you and the kind of things you like, and why you think it turns you on - don't use porn as a guide though, use your own feelings and knowledge.
.
Try and find some middle ground and compromise, try and understand why he's not interested and respect his views, ask him his fantasies and see if something can be found from them.
.
The only way forward is to talk to him, sensibly and rationally about how you feel - do so away from the bedroom.
.
Reassure him too - it's likely part of the reason is he doesn't want to hurt you or do the things we read every day are the wrong way to behave, even though for some of us they are what we want and desire.
.
Be prepared though to accept that this may not be for him and he is entirely vanilla - but the only way to find out is by having that conversation.

[hi****]

I think “free use” would be a good category to start him off in. It’ll scratch your itch and introduce him to something different.

You’ve been together for a decade. You should fully trust and know each other.

:)