Events - when to stop going (pregnant)

[mj****]

We have a curious question currently running through our heads and wonder if anyone is able to offer an opinion, especially anyone who has been in a similar situation.

We really enjoy going to local play events and try to get to them whenever we can. We enjoy both the socal side and of course been able to play.

We are going to have to stop attending for a while, but the question is at what point is it inappropriate to keep going?

We have around 3 months left, The bump is now becoming more noticeable and of course we are adapting our type and style of play to ensure everything is kept as safe as possible.

But we can't help but question ourselves as to do we carry on going to events for as long as is safe and practical or should we from stop now?

 

Edit

For clarity we don't play with others at these events, they are dedicated fetish events, not Swingers events.

Although we may play in open rooms, we don't invite others to join in. 

Edited April 23, 2023 by mjfsch
Clarification

[ke****]

Just on a moral level, stop

[Deleted Member]

I wouldn’t play with others while pregnant because you can’t be 100% sure that you won’t catch something, and then you could possibly pass it to your baby during birth. The risks outweigh the pros to me in this situation. Hope you guys find something that works for you! ☺️

[mj****]

5 minutes ago, Deleted profile said:

I wouldn’t play with others while pregnant because you can’t be 100% sure that you won’t catch something, and then you could possibly pass it to your baby during birth. The risks outweigh the pros to me in this situation. Hope you guys find something that works for you! ☺️

We have edited the post to clarify that we don't play with others while at events.

[Se****]

16 minutes ago, keishio said:

Just on a moral level, stop

Really??!! Why?

[QXX666]

Good question. But if you need a medical advice better ask your doctor or on a site with both knowledge, bdsm and medical.
Then obviously you will have the moral replies which could be from the hide that bump brigade to the people who are questioning the fact that you are not alone in that body anymore. Which bare the big “consent” stamp on it.
So if you are not going to play and only attend as a standby person then why not. And if you are going to still play read all about sexual activities during pregnancy…..

[mj****]

9 minutes ago, FatefulDestiny said:

Really??!! Why?

The moral side of the question is something we were intrested in, as everyone is entitled to see it from there own perspective and everyone's perspective is valid, it would have been nice if the person replying had elaborated as to why this was there opinion however

[mj****]

15 minutes ago, QXX666 said:

Good question. But if you need a medical advice better ask your doctor or on a site with both knowledge, bdsm and medical.
Then obviously you will have the moral replies which could be from the hide that bump brigade to the people who are questioning the fact that you are not alone in that body anymore. Which bare the big “consent” stamp on it.
So if you are not going to play and only attend as a standby person then why not. And if you are going to still play read all about sexual activities during pregnancy…..

Thanks for the reply!

We have consulted with our midwife and are making sure that any play we do is kept within safe limits, and always mindful of the bump.

Uptill now we have been active at the events, but we do only play together, we don't involve others.

It's an interesting additional question as to if it would be seen as acceptable to still attend purely from a socal point of view, or would it be seen as inappropriate to be in the venue at all

[Ceejayuk]

1 hour ago, keishio said:

Just on a moral level, stop

You realise that what you are doing is also against some peoples morals. So why don't you stop also.

Edited April 23, 2023 by Ceejayuk
Spelling:p

[QXX666]

1 hour ago, mjfsch said:

an interesting additional question as to if it would be seen as acceptable to still attend purely from a socal point of view, or would it be seen as inappropriate to be in the venue at all

As long the organisers don’t object to it then you are free to attend. If people have a moral ground to object your presence  they can leave. 

[QXX666]

5 minutes ago, Ceejayuk said:

You realise that what you are doing is also against some peoples morals. So why don't you stop also.

That’s what lots of people says about bdsm… so why don’t you ? 

[mj****]

6 minutes ago, Ceejayuk said:

You realise that what you are doing is also against some peoples morals. So why don't you stop also.

This is a really good point, and when it comes down to it, often in kink we operate in a very murky area where many would find the things that are enjoyed as been morally questionable

[Se****]

I’m seriously so irritated that a “moral obligation” has even been mentioned in relation to it. How and where is there a morality clause to it - please, it’s a genuine question I want the answer to?

Effectively what people are saying is that a pregnant woman should be hidden away and not have a sex life - Jesus, the 1950s are calling and they want you back. 

Pregnancy is not a disease or illness that needs to be shied away from. For the most part pregnant women are from a healthy populous and sex/play ought to have no bearing on the pregnancy (however always take your health professionals advice as you have done). 

In regards to the MORALITY people who have an issue with it really need to get a grip. I don’t care what anyone says, your penis is NOT big enough to touch the baby and the baby cannot see what you are doing. 

Ultimately, in UK a fetus has no rights until it is born so there is no consent issue there whatsoever; if there was all pregnant women would be banned from having intercourse (or many other things). Could this be what our patriarchal society actually want 🤔🤔🤔

In terms of hiding the bump - again, really!!! No. Absolutely not. 

Furthermore in UK law pregnant women are protected from discrimination - this may or may not stretch to a kink event which is technically a private event but (personally) I feel an organiser would be walking a very fine line asking someone to not attend purely because they are pregnant (I can’t even imagine it happening). 

And yes, I know people are going to argue about me but once again pregnancy is not a disease or illness to be hidden from the world. If there are no complications or contraindications the advice (as a general rule) is to continue your life as it were pre pregnancy. 

X

[Ceejayuk]

2 hours ago, QXX666 said:

That’s what lots of people says about bdsm… so why don’t you ? 

You realise that was my whole point to Keishio, who said stop. I do not have an issue with the op. So you just repeated my post essentially.

Edited April 23, 2023 by Ceejayuk

[Deleted Member]

As long as you both are comfortable with it, it seems you should keep going.

[CopperKnob]

2 hours ago, FatefulDestiny said:

I’m seriously so irritated that a “moral obligation” has even been mentioned in relation to it. How and where is there a morality clause to it - please, it’s a genuine question I want the answer to?

Effectively what people are saying is that a pregnant woman should be hidden away and not have a sex life - Jesus, the 1950s are calling and they want you back. 

Pregnancy is not a disease or illness that needs to be shied away from. For the most part pregnant women are from a healthy populous and sex/play ought to have no bearing on the pregnancy (however always take your health professionals advice as you have done). 

In regards to the MORALITY people who have an issue with it really need to get a grip. I don’t care what anyone says, your penis is NOT big enough to touch the baby and the baby cannot see what you are doing. 

Ultimately, in UK a fetus has no rights until it is born so there is no consent issue there whatsoever; if there was all pregnant women would be banned from having intercourse (or many other things). Could this be what our patriarchal society actually want 🤔🤔🤔

In terms of hiding the bump - again, really!!! No. Absolutely not. 

Furthermore in UK law pregnant women are protected from discrimination - this may or may not stretch to a kink event which is technically a private event but (personally) I feel an organiser would be walking a very fine line asking someone to not attend purely because they are pregnant (I can’t even imagine it happening). 

And yes, I know people are going to argue about me but once again pregnancy is not a disease or illness to be hidden from the world. If there are no complications or contraindications the advice (as a general rule) is to continue your life as it were pre pregnancy. 

X

I can't find the clappy hands emoji so you'll just have to imagine them 😂
.
Essentially if we're asking whether going to a play party whilst pregnant is moral, we're asking, is it right or wrong.
It's not illegal. It's not harming anyone (depending on the kink activity/consent/advise from the midwife which in this instance is stated to have been sought)
So whose sitting here in the comments judging? You know, in a community that 'prides' itself on being non-judgemental.
.
And, Fateful's right. If we're saying that pregnant women can't/shouldn't go to a kink event, what's next? Where are you (judgey people) drawing the line? I mean, if we're about to suggest they can't do the shopping, put the bins out, mow the lawn and go to work then I'm all for getting knocked up personally. Just as long as, you know, the dude has a decent enough job to keep me, the baby well cared for and a roof over our heads (yep, didn't think so)

[Mi****]

2 hours ago, FatefulDestiny said:

I’m seriously so irritated that a “moral obligation” has even been mentioned in relation to it. How and where is there a morality clause to it - please, it’s a genuine question I want the answer to?

Effectively what people are saying is that a pregnant woman should be hidden away and not have a sex life - Jesus, the 1950s are calling and they want you back. 

Pregnancy is not a disease or illness that needs to be shied away from. For the most part pregnant women are from a healthy populous and sex/play ought to have no bearing on the pregnancy (however always take your health professionals advice as you have done). 

In regards to the MORALITY people who have an issue with it really need to get a grip. I don’t care what anyone says, your penis is NOT big enough to touch the baby and the baby cannot see what you are doing. 

Ultimately, in UK a fetus has no rights until it is born so there is no consent issue there whatsoever; if there was all pregnant women would be banned from having intercourse (or many other things). Could this be what our patriarchal society actually want 🤔🤔🤔

In terms of hiding the bump - again, really!!! No. Absolutely not. 

Furthermore in UK law pregnant women are protected from discrimination - this may or may not stretch to a kink event which is technically a private event but (personally) I feel an organiser would be walking a very fine line asking someone to not attend purely because they are pregnant (I can’t even imagine it happening). 

And yes, I know people are going to argue about me but once again pregnancy is not a disease or illness to be hidden from the world. If there are no complications or contraindications the advice (as a general rule) is to continue your life as it were pre pregnancy. 

X

🙌🙌🙌👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

[QXX666]

1 hour ago, Ceejayuk said:

You realise that was my whole point to Keishio, who said stop. I do not have an issue with the op. So you just repeated my post essentially.

Must have been a glitch as I don’t tend to repeat other comments…but either way, 2 similar points better than none. 

[Mi****]

15 minutes ago, CopperKnob said:

I can't find the clappy hands emoji so you'll just have to imagine them 😂
.
Essentially if we're asking whether going to a play party whilst pregnant is moral, we're asking, is it right or wrong.
It's not illegal. It's not harming anyone (depending on the kink activity/consent/advise from the midwife which in this instance is stated to have been sought)
So whose sitting here in the comments judging? You know, in a community that 'prides' itself on being non-judgemental.
.
And, Fateful's right. If we're saying that pregnant women can't/shouldn't go to a kink event, what's next? Where are you (judgey people) drawing the line? I mean, if we're about to suggest they can't do the shopping, put the bins out, mow the lawn and go to work then I'm all for getting knocked up personally. Just as long as, you know, the dude has a decent enough job to keep me, the baby well cared for and a roof over our heads (yep, didn't think so)

Yes lady!!👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻🙌🙌🙌🙌

[Cu****]

The National Childbirth Trust gives answers to enjoying sex during pregnancy. Because you quite rightly point out that you don’t involve others in your play, the risk of STI is negated. The site also points out that a penis will not damage the unborn child, as the penis only penetrates the vagina, the womb is sealed by a natural plug at the cervix and the baby is in a sealed fluid filled bag (amniotic sac).

Surely, the OP is entitled, as anyone else, to enjoy her pregnancy with her partner, and any men who don’t like the site of a pregnant woman? …well that begs the question, what are you doing being on here then? Don’t tell me, you don’t hang around for that part.

[CopperKnob]

2 minutes ago, CumbriaLeather said:

The National Childbirth Trust gives answers to enjoying sex during pregnancy. Because you quite rightly point out that you don’t involve others in your play, the risk of STI is negated. The site also points out that a penis will not damage the unborn child, as the penis only penetrates the vagina, the womb is sealed by a natural plug at the cervix and the baby is in a sealed fluid filled bag (amniotic sac).

Surely, the OP is entitled, as anyone else, to enjoy her pregnancy with her partner, and any men who don’t like the site of a pregnant woman? …well that begs the question, what are you doing being on here then? Don’t tell me, you don’t hang around for that part.

I'll hazard a guess that it's those that are offended by the OPs question that drone on about this being a "sex site".

[Se****]

3 minutes ago, CopperKnob said:

I'll hazard a guess that it's those that are offended by the OPs question that drone on about this being a "sex site".

And want to censor a woman’s right to autonomy and control over her own body 😡

[CopperKnob]

6 minutes ago, FatefulDestiny said:

And want to censor a woman’s right to autonomy and control over her own body 😡

Well don't give them ideas! They'll soon start telling us we can't show tits AND arse and get offended if we breastfeed in public
Oh, no. Wait. I got that wrong

[Se****]

23 minutes ago, CopperKnob said:

Well don't give them ideas! They'll soon start telling us we can't show tits AND arse and get offended if we breastfeed in public
Oh, no. Wait. I got that wrong

Oh no. We’re absolutely entitled to show tits and arse provided it’s for (male) sexual gratification. Heaven forbid though that we may use our body the way it was intended and actually feed the child we carried and grew inside of us 🤦🏼‍♀️

[CopperKnob]

45 minutes ago, FatefulDestiny said:

Oh no. We’re absolutely entitled to show tits and arse provided it’s for (male) sexual gratification. Heaven forbid though that we may use our body the way it was intended and actually feed the child we carried and grew inside of us 🤦🏼‍♀️

Shit, that's right. I got this wrong on so many levels