Fetish.com
Login FREE SIGN-UP
Jump to content

WARNING DISBLAIMER

By Deleted Member
in BDSM Stories & Kinky Sex Confessions

 Share

Recommended Posts

Deleted Member

Posted
Posted (edited)

Reader. It's come to my attention that some of these stories have been associated with some highly impactful physiological effects.

There is no evidence that they directly cause these but the frequency of reported palpations,  tingles, nightsweats, enlarged nipples and outright wetness in the lady parts area is sufficient for me, under advice, to issue this guidance.

We take your wellbeing very seriously. 

Kindly note that these stories are of an intimate or comic nature and may induce erotic trance and a number of other enjoyable or potentially embarrasing effects. 

Do NOT read while driving or operating heavy machinery. Sex toys are not considered heavy (although one lady recently described her pnuematic drill rig which challenged this classification..ahem.)

For the absence of doubt vegetables are not machines. (What's that ? A jet propelled carrot? Oh you'll have to use your own judgement.)

Erm...well..look..I'm not responsible for any consequences, directly or indirectly, of you reading this stuff over, and over, and over, and basically losing your ability to function at work. (Although I admit I quite like the thought and if you want send me evidence of your complete undoing I'm sure we can come to a suitable arrangement)

Nor am I liable for any unfortunate events resulting from inadvisable insertions. UK readers will have recourse to Accident & Emergency (nhs) free at the point of need. Overseas readers...you're on your own.

Do NOT, repeat do NOT, keep sending me dry cleaning bills; and to the lady who sent her rather expensive soiled panties and a receipt, I regret we cannot er..return these ..er.

To the especially fragrant woman in Ohio (you know who you are) who was disappointed that the stories were not long enough for her bus journey commute, and complained that she had "only just got going", I am sorry for any unintentional distress caused. Stories are of a standard length and size isn't everything (so I am repeatedly being told.. it seems...cough). Anyhow,  kindly get in touch once more with an indication of the average journey duration and your reading s***d and our technical people will advise on appropriate modifications. Alternatively may I suggest that you try a seat directly above a rear wheel.

Edited by Deleted Member
improvements and typos

Deleted Member

Posted
  • Author
Posted

SEX AWARE: when the orgasms stop. STOP. It's really sensitive.  No really, I'm not jo...k..ing. Really pleeeese. No...look just give me a few minutes....oooooohhh!

Deleted Member

Posted
  • Author
Posted (edited)

FiNANCIAL RISK WARNING

The act of oral sex can go up and down.

In the sack past performance is,  in my experience,  a pretty good guide.

Those seeking a Paypig or to treat me as an ATM or doormat please note I have an ex - wife from 15 years back who's already has that nailed.

Edited by Deleted Member
improved

Deleted Member

Posted
  • Author
Posted

SERVING SUGGESTION

Get on your knees and  show me your tongue.

No artficial sweeteners.

May contain nuts.

Deleted Member

Posted
  • Author
Posted (edited)

SINIMA PLAYHOUSE RULES

Voyeurs,

Seating on the right of the auditorium has been designated a no wanking area. Your cooperation is highly appreciated.

No recording is permitted. Please switch off your mobile devices. The low rhythmic hum coming from the back row is reminding me I need to visit the dentist.

Thank you.

Edited by Deleted Member
improved

Deleted Member

Posted
  • Author
Posted

FLIGHT OF FANCY

Thank you for choosing Virgins today.

The erogenous zones are here and here.

Please place your partners sex bits in an upright position. And any wrists and ankles in the overhead padlocks.

In the unlikely event of an emergency, blow up dolls are available under your seats.

Sit back relax and I'll cabin crew will cum amongst you with light snacks and refreshments. Scratchcards anyone?

Deleted Member

Posted
  • Author
Posted
Rofl now thats hilarious
Bu****

Bu****

Posted
Posted

@PurrfectPanther I am booking my next flight very soon on your airlines...

  • 7 months later...
Charms

Charms

Posted
Posted

I wish there were links to all your other things you have written

Deleted Member

Posted
  • Author
Posted (edited)

1.Send a friend request or/and

2. Go to bdsm and kink forum and set filter to posts by purrfectpanther sort by date.

Im gradually reposting some of them

Edited by Deleted Member
Update
 Share
Go to topic listing
×
×
  • Create New...