Bdsm & Sex

[Blitzwing]

I'm wondering what ideas you guys have which I do not. The web these days is all the same material just repeated. 

 

So I want to ask you; how do you bring bondage not just into the bedroom. What scenarios do you enjoy? What positions do you use? What gives the best results for pleasure? Etc.

 

This is for a male dom and a female sub. 

[Deleted Member]

What a great question. I know something me and my hubby enjoy is the poking of sore bits (bruises and welts) when having sex. This is best when I'm on top. It definitely adds a wicked edge of BDSM to things and the extra *** leads to more pleasure for me. 

I'm interested to see what other people say and suggest!

[Deleted Member]

Hello .I agree this is an interesting subject 

But also every one is different so this question is quite subjective because everyone's is so  different . l like the control aspect obviously under this heading it's all about your imagination from let's say not allowing your sub to wear underwear with a dress for work to let's say to chastity devices the list goes on ...... 

The best option would be to sit down and talk about where you would like to go with the bondage side as this must be a two way street it's not about demanding after all the real power in a power exchange relationship is with the sub afte all he or she can say no and if you have anything about you as a real Top you will respect this 

Here are a couple of options to think about Say start with no underwear or something totally inappropriate for the day to day situation. 

Request the sub to spent the day with a pair of handcuffs on one wrist believe me this van get quite embarrassing questions asked .

If more advanced request they spend certain parts of the day with a butt pug in and ask for photo proof periodically throughout the day 

Input for others would be good it can be about subtle things ..

 

Thanks Christopher 

 

[Robustlove]

Hello there Blitzwing, those are some great questions. As Mrchristopher70 has mentioned though, any advice you get will be highly subjective and not necessarily well suited to either you, your sub or your situation/relationship with each other.

 

Lets deal with your questions in order, so first question was, "How do you bring bondage not just into the bedroom". Well that question itself can be interpreted in a few ways, so I have to assume like the reply above that you are talking about how do you control or play with your sub outside of the bedroom, for example in other rooms of the house/flat or outside in the vanilla world. Mrchristopher70 has given you some great suggestions toward this aim, so let me offer a few more for use outside of the home are first.

 

Have you heard of Ben-Wa balls? These are great little sex toys to use to either punish or train your sub when you are not around. They can be inserted into the vagina and thanks to them being weighted with a moveable weight inside they will be moving around and shifting the type of sensations your sub is going to feel all day dependent on her own movements. Your sub should be commanded to keep them in all day until you remove them and what they do is act to stimulate the intimate areas with pressure and light friction, causing their sensitivity to heighten and their yearning for release to build steadily as the day goes on. The fun and control aspect is that you won't allow them release until you deem it earned, yet they will be craving it like crazy. One tip though, never use these balls anally, they do not have a flared base that will keep them held in place and they are not designed for anal usage as they can move through the anal passage to far up to be easily retrievable. 

 

Anal plugs can be a great tool as mentioned above for insertion and use on a daily basis however you can also use a great variety of other sex toys that YOU can control from a distance. Sex toys such as Vibease, Lovense, We-Vibe etc, are toys that you can remotely control to start vibrating discreetly either inserted into your subs vagina or taped inside her panties on her clit or labia. There area great many variations of these toys and you can easily control them via app's on your phone or even via text messages. This lets your sub know that you can control her and her pleasure whenever and wherever she is, and you can tease and stimulate her with these toys all day, so that she is ready to explode when you meet up later on. Other such toys like the Kiiroo will allow you to both experience long distance pleasure that is linked to your partners use of the sex toy (Vibrator) you have provided and matched with the male masturbator so that you can feel each other affecting each other even when you can't be present.

 

Now if you really want to go the extra mile, then layering is the name of the game. So you've had her try using butt plugs and keep them in all day, you've had her use Ben-wa Balls and keep those in all day, you've had her use remote controlled vibrating toys and kept them going all day...but now you begin to layer the pleasure and control by using an anal plug in the ass and some Ben Wa balls in the vagina, perhaps even adding a vibrating egg into her panties. Now that is some deeply sensual and erotic control you will have over her and her poor little sub mind will struggle all day to do anything other than exactly what you tell her to do.

 

You can also add to the fun and or her embarrassment/defilement in public by marking her in obvious ways that other people will see and she will have to explain away somehow. Such as leaving love bites on her breasts where the cleavage shows, on her legs and thighs, on her neck and shoulders etc. While your sub should be proud to show of her Dom/Masters marks, she will likely also be deeply embarrassed and when you choose the marks to make and the clothing she must wear to show them off, it adds another dimension to the fun and games you can play with each other outside of the bedroom.

 

Now for any type of play that is outside of the bedroom but still in the privacy of your's or her home, then the options are near endless.

 

Do you have chairs which you can tie her up to? If so then binding her ankles to a chair, with her wrists bound behind her back to the chair and blindfolded will put her in a position of complete submission to your will and desires. You could use tickle ***, ice, heat, floggers, whips, paddles or simply well timed and placed pressure of kisses or even your tongue to tease and heighten her arousal and get her mind melting into the abyss of submitting to the feeling and getting lost in sub space. The sensory deprivation could be heightened with ear plugs or a ball gag and it's also a good opportunity to take pictures of her which you can show her later on and enjoy together. A spreader bar could be used to keep her legs wide open and yet still cuffed to the chair base.  Does she enjoy nipple ***? Then add some nipple clamps or vacuum suction tubes to really apply the pressure. 

 

Sofa's can also be used as well as the floor for hogtying, however if you hog tie her on a sofa it gives you a better position and height for you to be able to use her for a good session of face-fucking and ***d gagging/deep throating. A good tip here is to vary the deep throating whilst bound by flipping her over from time to time to she is taking you in her mouth upside down.

 

K-9 restraints and body stocks need ample room for use and unless you are lucky enough to have a large expanse of floor space in the bedroom, then these must be used in a larger lounge type room where you can have her held in position on the floor. These work great and similar to spreader bars will hold your sub in place with most of her penetrable orifices exposed and ready for any use you deem fit for them. They can be pricey for those types of system, however you can also buy from Etsy smaller and cheaper wooden stocks for only the hands and head, so experiment and play with them all if you can.

 

The use of wands in any play is a great help int he process of layering play at home outside of the bedroom and in. You can buy cheaper and still effective wands that can be used in ***d orgasm work to great effect, but the best results come from the more powerful mains operated versions, as those vibrations can rarely be resisted by even the most stubborn subs clitoris or vagina. Some of the smaller wands work well as dildos which can be inserted into the vagina and if you combine the use of a wand with nipple clamps and a vibrating butt plug then your sub will be literally putty in your hands 9 times of out 10.

 

I hope that all gives you some food for thought. I could have written a small book, but if you need any more ideas or hints then simply let us know more about what you and your sub enjoy and the advice can be tailored and suited more to your mutual enjoyment.

 

 

[Deleted Member]

Great post the my friend great read ..Christopher

[Robustlove]

Thank you for the compliment Christopher, I'm glad you enjoyed the reading.

 

One area that I did not touch upon in my previous posting was the use of rope and rope work. Good rope work is an absolute art in and of itself, however it is also an immensely satisfying area to begin learning and using if your partner has an interest in this area. Literally anyone can tie a person up and bind them with ropes either using objects such as chairs, pillars, bed posts, tables etc, however finding out the correct knots and applications takes a great deal of learning and practical application. The great thing about this is that you can learn together with your partner or sub and get better and better the more you practice and learn. A good place to start is with the Twisted Monk Starter Kit available form Fetters.com as this provides you not only with the best hemp rope's (x3 lengths of them) for BDSM use, but also an instructional DVD to get you started with the basics and over a dozen useful and fun tying positions to experiment with. If you are interested in learning more then the following two books are must have's for any rigging enthusiast: 

 

Two Knotty Boys Showing You the Ropes: A Step-By-Step, Illustrated Guide for Tying Sensual and Decorative Rope Bondage   

 

Two Knotty Boys Back on the Ropes

 

One great way to expand your rope bondage use outside of the bedroom is to use things such as breast and chest rigs for your sub to wear underneath her regular clothing in public or at work instead of her usual undergarments. Also try full body rope ties that rig and caress every part of her body from her crotch and ass up to her breasts and shoulders as they can be used to great affect this way as not only an act of funishment, but also as an extra means of *** and control. Another good book for this work is 

 

Shibari You Can Use by Lee Harrington

 

Another area that neither myself or any other commentators have mentioned so far is the use of sex clubs or more specifically to your relationship, the use of dungeons; wherein you and your sub will find a great wealth of BDSM toys, equipment and furniture that the average BDSM enthusiast simply cannot afford or will not have the private space to set up in their home. These places are great for not only pushing your sub's boundaries but also your own and you will often meet other friendly enthusiasts that will give you hints, tips and share their knowledge and experience with you both should you ask and engage them. 

 

The site administrators could no doubt give you some good tips on the best places to go and enjoy with your partner/sub or if you both would prefer to keep your kink's private and are not up for public displays then I would take a look at somewhere like The Fetish Studio which is fairly nearby Blitzwing in Berkshire. These private dungeon for hire or BDSM rooms for hire usually offer a great deal of variety int he BDSM furniture you can use in private such as St.Andrews crosses, bondage tables/benches, medical examination chairs etc. Trips away to places like this can not only add some spice and variety to your play sessions, but can also be fantastic experiences to further your own mastery of BDSM techniques and toys and I have no doubt many subs would appreciate a sensual and sexy weekend away as a treat for good behavior.