ADHD and Kink

[P_****]

ADHD and kink. Do you find they compliment each other?

Are you hyper focused subbing?

Perhaps you’re too distracted by the cat?

[Th****]

I have to be careful about my time blindness and how long I *** someone. There are A LOT of neurodivergent kinksters out there. There's even a whole virtual educational conference that focuses on neurodivergence and kink. 

[Deleted Member]

I think there’s a massive connection between the two.

[Pr****]

The ultimate edging…Doctor writes you a Rx for adderall…you get excited…take to a pharmacy and can’t get it filled bc the sadist pharmacist tells you there’s a manufacturing shortage nationwide.
You want to play to get your mind off of it…but every time you start watching a good video and playing you end up doing research on Brazilian butterflies bc you can’t stay focused long enough to finish playing!

[Va****]

I find I have more of a problem with fixating and obsessing over kink. I play out fantasy scenes in my head every time I discover a new kink. I study up on it, and obsess over trying to learn everything I can. This might not be seen as a bad thing, and often I can harness my ADHD for good... but I know it can be a strain on my relationship. I am never content with the way things are, and I'm always "chasing my next fix." Every new kink obsession is followed up with guilt because I worry that I'm making my wife feel like she's not enough. ADHD fixation can be strong but short lived sometimes. But when you can't indulge the fixation, then it can rot and faster inside your brain like a cancer... Although, that could just be my adhd brain overthinking things again

[Ba****]

I think (as someone with adhd) adhd and kink are fine, but there are a lot of things to factor in. The initial hyperfocus the adhd person has in their new person can be mistaken for love bombing, which can be a narcissistic tell. So it’s important for there to be a lot of open communication between all parties.

The flip side, so long as that communication is there and the other person is good, an adhd submissive thrives with the discipline offered by a Dominant.

Disclaimer: Only speaking from my own perspective.

[de****]

  1 hour ago, Professor4You said:

The ultimate edging…Doctor writes you a Rx for adderall…you get excited…take to a pharmacy and can’t get it filled bc the sadist pharmacist tells you there’s a manufacturing shortage nationwide.
You want to play to get your mind off of it…but every time you start watching a good video and playing you end up doing research on Brazilian butterflies bc you can’t stay focused long enough to finish playing!

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Bahahaha that’s spot on😂

[FillmeUp-5673]

I'm definitely super hyper focused subbing

[P_****]

My experience (male switch)

Subbing:
It’s great. Impact especially gives me one thing I have to focus on. It clears my head from all the other crap whizzing about in it usually.

Domming: Sometimes more challenging but not a bad thing and still great. I’m able to maintain focus on the experience given and that’s where I get my kicks. But, I’ve had to learn not to change what’s going on too quickly and have to keep an eye on myself that I’m not letting it take control of what’s happening.

The real benefits come from things like safety. Check ins etc. The more extreme things are getting the more I’m able to allocate focus to keeping it fun.

We’re both a bit neuro-spicy which helps massively regardless of what’s happening. I’ll often be walking around with a paddle in one hand and my vape in the other.

Ultimately, I’m just being me. Being with somebody you can genuinely be yourself and have an amazing time together is always the best bit. Kink has always been far more expressive for that.

[P_****]

  3 hours ago, Professor4You said:

The ultimate edging…Doctor writes you a Rx for adderall…you get excited…take to a pharmacy and can’t get it filled bc the sadist pharmacist tells you there’s a manufacturing shortage nationwide.
You want to play to get your mind off of it…but every time you start watching a good video and playing you end up doing research on Brazilian butterflies bc you can’t stay focused long enough to finish playing!

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Also a fellow lepidopterist! I’ll sometimes have to steer my brain away from a ***ted lady I saw earlier because now really isn’t the time.

[Dom_Kev]

I find “perfection before practice” is My worst enemy… playing out how it “should” go before ever trying something.
… and don’t get Me started on distractions when trying to SQUIRREL… 🐿️!!…

[P_****]

  8 minutes ago, Dom_Kev said:

I find “perfection before practice” is My worst enemy… playing out how it “should” go before ever trying something.
… and don’t get Me started on distractions when trying to SQUIRREL… 🐿️!!…

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Definitely something I’m guilty of, and the squirrel.

[Dom_Kev]

How do you get over/round it (not the squirrel, that’s impossible)? If I “just do it”, I always look back and realise I messed up, whether it be that first message, or taking forever to get back with that “perfect reply”… I can’t seem to find a middle ground

[P_****]

  40 minutes ago, Dom_Kev said:

How do you get over/round it (not the squirrel, that’s impossible)? If I “just do it”, I always look back and realise I messed up, whether it be that first message, or taking forever to get back with that “perfect reply”… I can’t seem to find a middle ground

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I think you just have to accept that regretting doing something is better than regretting not doing it (most of the time) and that we all mess up sometimes, it's part of being human. - C

[Dom_Kev]

Wise words I think, thank you

[P_****]

P: especially being dominant you often don’t want to say or do the wrong thing. You put this extra, false pressure on yourself to be perfect.

I’m much more warts and all now. We’re not the most serious when playing. We can be. But often we’re having a genuine giggle being ourselves while we’re up to no good.

There’s this perception, I think I used to put on myself, that the dominant always has to be this serious, imposing character. It’s just that, a character. Fine if that’s you, but I’d rather be myself.

[lo****]

  13 hours ago, Professor4You said:

The ultimate edging…Doctor writes you a Rx for adderall…you get excited…take to a pharmacy and can’t get it filled bc the sadist pharmacist tells you there’s a manufacturing shortage nationwide.
You want to play to get your mind off of it…but every time you start watching a good video and playing you end up doing research on Brazilian butterflies bc you can’t stay focused long enough to finish playing!

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It's even worse... I have been hearing those who had been on adderall a long time and were able to get their hands on it recently say SOMETHING has changed and it no longer works. A lot of them this had been the ONLY thing that works. OFC the manufacturer is like "nuh uh, we didn't change anything." But lots of people are saying "I doesn't work anymore. WTF?"

[Dom_Kev]

I am (was) on Xaggitin, but now that doesn’t seem to be available… thankfully the alternative seems to be working still. It must be a nightmare to find something that actually works, only to have it taken away.

[FillmeUp-5673]

I want to try

[Deleted Member]

Adderall stopped working a few years ago I’ve been on the struggle bus ever since trying to find something 🥺

[P_****]

  2 minutes ago, jules____ said:

Adderall stopped working a few years ago I’ve been on the struggle bus ever since trying to find something 🥺

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Ah, that fucking sucks. My SSRIs stopped working recently. Back to lala land.

I’ve always found kink, particularly subbing, is excellent for hyper focus. Impact gives me something I have to focus on and clears my head.

[Deleted Member]

I am dying for that and my depression meds don’t work either and went off my anxiety meds just spiraling and made an account here like why not at this point

[Deleted Member]

Oh and the cat and dogs *always* distract

[P_****]

Yeah, our cats are quite used to us smacking the hell out of each other now.

“Oh, they’re at it again…”

[Deleted Member]

lol my ***s aren’t around that and freak out