Kink without sex?

[Ne****]

Hello, All!

Do YOU have to have sexual gratification whenever you engage in any type of ‘play’?


For Myself, there is sexual activity and there is impact ‘therapy’ as I’ll refer to it due to disliking calling it “play”, and sometimes the two can intermingle but are also most distinctly separate.

[Deviant_Ric]

Personally, I can equally enjoy kink with and without penetrative sexual activity. Some of my most memorable and intense experiences have been without ‘PIV’, to coin a phrase. And I really love PIV!
It absolutely comes down to the connection and context of the relationship/scene.

[Ne****]

  4 minutes ago, Deviant_Ric said:

Personally, I can equally enjoy kink with and without penetrative sexual activity. Some of my most memorable and intense experiences have been without ‘PIV’, to coin a phrase. And I really love PIV!
It absolutely comes down to the connection and context of the relationship/scene.

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That’s great. To be clear, I wasn’t referring to only PIV or penetrative sex - I mean any manner of sex. It isn’t the point for me in some sessions.

[Ni****]

Yeah, I don’t really care about receiving anything. I like making people happy. And I don’t really get picky about what it takes, I kinda just act how I know they want. I don’t care if I cum or get anything. 90% of the joy I get during play, is based off reactions, and results. 😂

[Ne****]

  32 minutes ago, NickAtlas said:

Yeah, I don’t really care about receiving anything. I like making people happy. And I don’t really get picky about what it takes, I kinda just act how I know they want. I don’t care if I cum or get anything. 90% of the joy I get during play, is based off reactions, and results. 😂

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I’d argue that in pleasing others you ARE getting something but I get what you mean 🙂

[bt****]

It’s called playing pretend and most people grew out of it by the age of 9

[Ne****]

  6 minutes ago, btiti97 said:

It’s called playing pretend and most people grew out of it by the age of 9

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Not sure what you’re referring to or saying here.

[Ri****]

I have referred to it as therapy too.
My submissive actively uses it to help her reset and relive stress and anxiety.
It’s an important part of her whole experience.
I get a lot from that too. Supporting her through it all and helping her go deeper and harder (as our discussions have dictated).

[Es****]

This an interesting question. I for one need intimacy. Not necessarily sex. But definitely intimacy. It’s more about the connection and gratification of the relationship than the sexual activity itself. So short answer, no. I do not need sexual gratification whenever engaging in play.

[Ro****]

Reaching for an agreement in the past with a Dom, I told her I didn't mind if we had oenetrative sex or not while playing. Her answer was If there was not penetrative sex involved, there was no point in the meeting. That really confused me...

[Cu****]

No.

[Ch****]

I make a point to people that sex isn't my focus, it's not something I need with my kink.
I like the kink activities, they can take my mind to a different place that sex simply cant.
Very few people I've involved both together x
Im glad this topic came up as I'm constantly told that I'm on the wrong site if I'm not into the sex side, 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

Edited August 9, 2024 by Cheekysub247

[Rudmaster]

Most of the times no sex.... Just a game..

[MF****]

I think that depending on the scenario or what’s going on during kink fun. Sex ruins the hotness or the vibe.

[Si****]

Very few of my kink partners involved sex. For me, sex is right at the bottom of my list. I’m happy with my partner so the sex part is reserved for her. Kink is something very separate. Being in control of your own sexual urges that is the test to one’s own control. Playing with the mind can be just as rewarding.

[Ne****]

  5 hours ago, Escalon8503 said:

This an interesting question. I for one need intimacy. Not necessarily sex. But definitely intimacy. It’s more about the connection and gratification of the relationship than the sexual activity itself. So short answer, no. I do not need sexual gratification whenever engaging in play.

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You bring up another great point: sex and intimacy are not the same thing!

[Ne****]

  3 hours ago, Rockstone83 said:

Reaching for an agreement in the past with a Dom, I told her I didn't mind if we had oenetrative sex or not while playing. Her answer was If there was not penetrative sex involved, there was no point in the meeting. That really confused me...

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That’s unfortunate for You in that scenario; what someone wants or needs is valid and we don’t always align. However, to think that every BDSM or kink encounter is about and or needs sexual activity would be errant. Kink doesn’t equal sex, though of course it can and does, regardless of an individual’s desire or requirements.

[Ne****]

  3 hours ago, Cheekysub247 said:

I make a point to people that sex isn't my focus, it's not something I need with my kink.
I like the kink activities, they can take my mind to a different place that sex simply cant.
Very few people I've involved both together x
Im glad this topic came up as I'm constantly told that I'm on the wrong site if I'm not into the sex side, 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

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Precisely. Excellent points.

[Ne****]

  23 minutes ago, MFOXXX said:

I think that depending on the scenario or what’s going on during kink fun. Sex ruins the hotness or the vibe.

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Interesting take and one that I too have recognised.

[Ne****]

  11 minutes ago, SirGreen said:

Very few of my kink partners involved sex. For me, sex is right at the bottom of my list. I’m happy with my partner so the sex part is reserved for her. Kink is something very separate. Being in control of your own sexual urges that is the test to one’s own control. Playing with the mind can be just as rewarding.

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Vast spectrum!

[Deleted Member]

I enjoy the subspace feeling from impact and bondage without sex. It is common in my local kink community to have BDSM scenes without sex and play partners that are not full sexual partners. I have both romantic sexual relationships and BDSM focused relationships.

[Rudmaster]

Agree with most of u.... Everything is planed in my case ... So I know in advance if we involve sex or not...

[Ne****]

  47 minutes ago, exploramore said:

I enjoy the subspace feeling from impact and bondage without sex. It is common in my local kink community to have BDSM scenes without sex and play partners that are not full sexual partners. I have both romantic sexual relationships and BDSM focused relationships.

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Fantastic!

[Ne****]

  51 minutes ago, Rudmaster said:

Agree with most of u.... Everything is planed in my case ... So I know in advance if we involve sex or not...

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Another cogent way to be.

[RandoriUK]

Define 'sexual gratification' and who should be receiving and/or giving it.