Ne**** Posted August 9 Author Posted August 9 18 minutes ago, RandoriUK said: Define 'sexual gratification' and who should be receiving and/or giving it. You bring up another point - we don’t all enjoy nor become gratified by the same things. One could for instance feel gratification of a sexual ambience without engaging in sexual activity. What I specifically refer to in my post is sexual engagement achieved through sexual physical contact such as genital sex, oral sex, anal sex, needing genital stimulation and or ejaculation, orgasm….
na**** Posted August 9 Posted August 9 Me and my mentor have been together for about 4 years. We have never had sex. I've orgasmed loads (like all the time with him) but not through sex. He has imprinted certain smells (using incents) that trigger me differently depending on the scene and the scent. It's taken years but now my body reacts just when I walk in2 the room just by the smell and sounds being played.
Ne**** Posted August 9 Author Posted August 9 45 minutes ago, RandoriUK said: Define 'sexual gratification' and who should be receiving and/or giving it. Who should be receiving and or giving is entirely up to the players. To my point per this post, there is no sexual element as described by my previous comment involved by any participating party. If one or more derive pleasure and or experience sexual arousal from the non-sexual activities, no problem, but in those instances there wouldn’t be any sexual exchange or “finishing” - the end of the scene/session/entire encounter from beginning to end would not include any acts of sex.
Ne**** Posted August 9 Author Posted August 9 15 minutes ago, naughtything said: Me and my mentor have been together for about 4 years. We have never had sex. I've orgasmed loads (like all the time with him) but not through sex. He has imprinted certain smells (using incents) that trigger me differently depending on the scene and the scent. It's taken years but now my body reacts just when I walk in2 the room just by the smell and sounds being played. This would be conditioning. 😇Not to what I were referring in my OP but yet another viable option/scenario and compelling aspect!
ar**** Posted August 9 Posted August 9 One of the first WOW moments I had when reading up on kink, is that (penetrative) sex isn't a given in kink, and neither is nudity. Even though "kink" is often defined as (nonconventional) sexual behavior, the rules of engagement are to be determined between partners. I agree that the word "play" seems to imply an element of fun/enjoyment where some interactions may be more the***utic. But are they still kink then?
Ne**** Posted August 9 Author Posted August 9 10 minutes ago, arnhem961 said: One of the first WOW moments I had when reading up on kink, is that (penetrative) sex isn't a given in kink, and neither is nudity. Even though "kink" is often defined as (nonconventional) sexual behavior, the rules of engagement are to be determined between partners. I agree that the word "play" seems to imply an element of fun/enjoyment where some interactions may be more the***utic. But are they still kink then? I’d argue they are but can’t disagree that some might not consider it so. Think: the***utic massage versus sensual massage - both are still massage. 🤷🏻♂️……
Ch**** Posted August 9 Posted August 9 For me 'play' just means meeting people, so it would be kink, it might be more relaxed fun, or it might be very intense screaming and tears lol. 12 minutes ago, arnhem961 said: One of the first WOW moments I had when reading up on kink, is that (penetrative) sex isn't a given in kink, and neither is nudity. Even though "kink" is often defined as (nonconventional) sexual behavior, the rules of engagement are to be determined between partners. I agree that the word "play" seems to imply an element of fun/enjoyment where some interactions may be more the***utic. But are they still kink then?
ar**** Posted August 10 Posted August 10 1 hour ago, NexumSange said: I’d argue they are but can’t disagree that some might not consider it so. Think: the***utic massage versus sensual massage - both are still massage. 🤷🏻♂️…… What's your definition of "kink" then, are you saying that both those massages would be kink? 🤔
Ne**** Posted August 10 Author Posted August 10 15 minutes ago, arnhem961 said: What's your definition of "kink" then, are you saying that both those massages would be kink? 🤔 No, that both are massages… that both kink with and kink without sex are still/can be considered kink.
no**** Posted August 10 Posted August 10 Absolutely, play can easily be non-sexual. It's just like a shared hobby or interest. When I'm engaged in rope play I don't find it particularly sexual (though it does come in handy in the bedroom), it's just something fascinating and fun. In other cases the experience can also be sexually stimulating without it leading to sexual activity. Spanking and impact play are always thrilling to me, but they do not necessarily lead to anything else. As with most things in kink, as long as the people involved are communicative and on the same page, how you define things is up to you.
MasterDarcy1979 Posted August 10 Posted August 10 No. Kink comes in all shapes in sizes. There can be instances of kink where it's solely about training or BDSM or whatever your heart desires. A BDSM based dynamic should not have sex as the be-all and end-all. If it is then there's a very good chance that the flame of the candle will quickly fizzle out In actual fact, sex should be something that you strive for. There are way more important things to build a relationship on.
Ma**** Posted August 10 Posted August 10 i do it all the time it's not about what's at the finnish line it's about the corners it's about play time ... it's about time to play
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