stickylipgloss Posted August 15 Posted August 15 I don’t know if this is the right place to ask, but how does one deal with aesthetic preferences vs tactile sensations? I have this thing where I like to see/touch my bones, like my hipbones or ribs. It’s comforting and makes me feel small. But on the other hand, I am aware of how gross it is to the touch for other people. I feel self conscious when people hug me and do the warm rub on the back, because I know they can feel the ribs. I am a virgin and the thought of someone touching me and getting all grossed out in the middle of sex is bothering me. I know simple weight gain can fix it, but I just got over my eating disorder a couple of years ago, and the *** of weight gain is always in the back of my mind. I feel like I LOOK good but I’m just not that pleasant to touch, hug or have sex with. I’m conflicted
an**** Posted August 16 Posted August 16 Firstly, it's important to remember that everyone has different preferences and comfort levels, both aesthetically and physically. What might feel self-conscious to you may not be a concern for someone else. The right partner will appreciate you for who you are, including all the unique aspects of your body. It’s also understandable to feel conflicted, especially considering your history with an eating disorder. Healing from that and managing body image concerns can be a lifelong journey, and it’s okay to take it one step at a time. Instead of focusing on how others might perceive you, try to stay grounded in how you feel in your body. Feeling good about how you look and being comfortable with your body is a positive thing, and you shouldn’t feel pressured to change that for someone else’s comfort. It’s also okay to set boundaries or communicate your feelings to a partner when you feel ready to be intimate. Ultimately, intimacy is about connection, trust, and mutual respect. The right person will appreciate all of you, including the parts that make you feel self-conscious. You deserve to feel loved and accepted exactly as you are.
Am**** Posted August 16 Posted August 16 Thicker male here I think you’re amazing. I normally go with a thicker woman as I think they like me more and be more attracted to me. But if any woman messages me saying hey I need to be put in my place I would do it with her.
wi**** Posted August 16 Posted August 16 I can understand where your coming from I was very thin for most of my life im not much heavier now but have heard that I should put on weight so many times but it's not about their preference whatever makes you happy is what's important if your happy with how you look that's all that matters and anyone you decide to be with should be happy with that as well you are a beautiful woman. I know cuz I'd want to be with you 💋
jo**** Posted August 16 Posted August 16 Your figure is fine. Different people like Different things so just find someone who appreciates you the way you are and supports you in achieving what you want.
br**** Posted August 16 Posted August 16 Ummm ma’am you’re incredibly hot based off your one picture. I don’t think any guy would be worried about that if they’re with you. In any way sexual or non. Plenty of men if not the majority probably prefer a beautiful fit woman
Mr**** Posted August 16 Posted August 16 Bring comfortable with yourself is the biggest key to any successful engagement involving sex. That doesn’t me you HAVE to feel it at the onset, but finish someone or a place where you feel safe enough to let your guard down and BE touched. Or touch yourself in front of another to experience their response, that can make all the difference. Taking your time, being ready whenever you are, and just realizing it’s your experience could also help. Just be you. The rest will follow. GL out there. You’re beautiful inside and out and when the day comes that you embrace your awesomeness and tell that lying voice to fuck off, watch out world!
ar**** Posted August 16 Posted August 16 If being a virgin bothers you a lot, you may be keen to hook up with a random person to just "get it over with". That's one mindset. . Another one, would be to look for someone you feel comfortable with, build a connection with, and open up to about your insecurity. The right person will say they don't mind at all and love you for your soul. Your body is a vessel, and they will be the ones to make you realize you're perfectly fine the way you are. They will love every inch of it, because they will know it belongs to you.
Lsmart938 Posted August 16 Posted August 16 I think you look great and I definitely would like to get my hands all over you - bones included. I’m sure other guys would say the same. Most guys won’t overthink it. But it’s you that has to feel comfortable so maybe you need to find someone and know them and feel comfortable with them before taking that step ?
su**** Posted August 16 Posted August 16 Firstly well done on achieving your weight loss Men really won’t over think this like said above. Perhaps you’re missing the curves? Guy or girl as suggested above, you look great I find it hard to believe your a virgin but how would I know I say take the bull by the horns get over yourself and just enjoy another person whomever you may choose
To**** Posted August 16 Posted August 16 You look just fine. And you also just feel fine. ^^ You are a human being and as such just made from meat and bones and that's all there is to it. However, what you describe sounds like some form of body dysmorphia to me - you wrote about overcoming an eating disorder, but your *** of somebody being grossed out about feeling your ribs seems to be of similar origin(?) Gaining weight doesn't "fix" that - because there is nothing to fix. You look just fine. You will feel just fine to a person that wants to be with you. I am not sure how you overcame your eating disorder, but maybe talking about this kind of feeling with a therapist would help you the most. From the picture in your profile you look like a perfectly fine, attractive girl to me and I can assure you that nobody being with you and having sex with you will in the middle of the act just suddenly feel like you are not their body type anymore. :D
dominionhub Posted August 18 Posted August 18 As stated by several people above, someone that close to you is not going to be deterred by your body. If you accept the health risks of being that thin, that is fine. And, it will be fine for anybody who is that close to you. And remember, with weight, it is not just how much weight, it is what sort of weight. If you are not happy with your body, there are things to do besides simply "gain weight".
enrfun Posted August 18 Posted August 18 Perhaps you should work on normal sexual goals before you become a sub for a Dom. You have a long way to go, but you will enjoy yourself if you pace yourself and don’t try to rush things.
Co**** Posted August 21 Posted August 21 Hey.......you are a Beautiful young woman, who has overcome something many don't have to. So you are strong too. . I would say.....wait unti you meet that man who makes you feel relaxed and Beautiful. Who you can share anything with.......including your anxieties.....and so called ' bad bits' you are worrying about. Who respects and Treasures you and realises what a Gift you are sharing with him. It ll happen, and then you ll blossom and grow more Confident. Meanwhile.....don't overthink. Enjoy Life. Love to You on your journey Xxx🙏
stickylipgloss Posted August 22 Author Posted August 22 19 hours ago, CosmicAngel said: Hey.......you are a Beautiful young woman, who has overcome something many don't have to. So you are strong too. . I would say.....wait unti you meet that man who makes you feel relaxed and Beautiful. Who you can share anything with.......including your anxieties.....and so called ' bad bits' you are worrying about. Who respects and Treasures you and realises what a Gift you are sharing with him. It ll happen, and then you ll blossom and grow more Confident. Meanwhile.....don't overthink. Enjoy Life. Love to You on your journey Xxx🙏 Thank you 🥹
Lsmart938 Posted August 23 Posted August 23 On 8/21/2024 at 10:47 PM, CosmicAngel said: Hey.......you are a Beautiful young woman, who has overcome something many don't have to. So you are strong too. . I would say.....wait unti you meet that man who makes you feel relaxed and Beautiful. Who you can share anything with.......including your anxieties.....and so called ' bad bits' you are worrying about. Who respects and Treasures you and realises what a Gift you are sharing with him. It ll happen, and then you ll blossom and grow more Confident. Meanwhile.....don't overthink. Enjoy Life. Love to You on your journey Xxx🙏 Nice reply !
Widowkj Posted August 24 Posted August 24 Be you. Don't try to please the next person. Don't gain or lose for someone else. Just be the beautiful person inside and out that you are and there will be someone that respects that. Don't try to fit a square peg into a round relationship hole.you do what is safe and right for you and your body. Be safe, be healthy, and be loved.
ch**** Posted October 20 Posted October 20 Hey! Wir müssen reden. Schick mir, wenn du Zeit hast, eine Antwort.
Fushia Posted October 21 Posted October 21 I totally get where you are coming from. (Virgin too) But also gained a lot of weight. I'm learning how to just love myself. I do think I need to lose weight but also I am trying not to be hard on myself.
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