Being a brat, complicated?

[Little_Duck]

What can you do if the other person is not noticing you are bratting and misinterpretated the behavior?

 

I am a more subtile playful brat not a mean one. What i did tried already is telling i am a brat but that also doesn't work cuz if you are saying something very serious to them than they think you are bratting. Than they don't take you serious. So i feel misunderstood. It happens to me all the time. Maybe it is because i talk regulary to new people, i don't know. Am i the only one what is having this problem? 

Also i notice if somebody else is bratting it is indeed also hard to interpretated the behavior right away and act on it. I notice it when the moment is passed.

[Na****]

I have a difficult time too haha

[Deleted Member]

I think you need to have an open and honest conversation about what you both deem as being bratty and find out what level you're both happy with. Communication is key in every aspect of this world and if you don't habe that level of communication, it is difficult to navigate a dynamic. If you're also talking to lots of different people all of the time, that too will make it difficult. If you're wanting one person, you should focus and build on that. I wouldn't go bratting without getting to know someone and finding what works. If you have multiple options you should try and figure out what you really want and get to know eachother first. Bratting can be fun with the right person and with good communication. Also remember not everyone is ok with bratting. You need to ask if they consent to that as it may not be what they're after.

[Ba****]

This might be an unpopular take, but you can’t brat without consent and / or dynamic of some level (that can be a single scene). Anything else is sarcasm or humour.

Brats still need to be ethical, which means they need consent. You can’t have consent without a conversation about what is considered bratting and where the line is. It isn’t a free pass to act out at anyone who labels themselves as a Top or Dominant.

I think you’ll continue to be misunderstood until you start having these conversations. It’s hard at first, but very quickly becomes easy.

[Am****]

Comming from a very dominant man that has a hard time reading what the brattiness is about you need to talk it out at times to me. If your being that way for sex and to be played with sorry you may have to say somthing to me. Know if you say I’m doing this cause I need attention or to be please I normal say I’m sorry then try and get into the act. I coke from a physical demanding job that can be stressful for me., sometimes I’m honestly too tired to notice. No that doesn’t not mean I don’t care or I’m not wanting you happy. I’m also old school yes you’re a brat but communicate with me. I’m not here for guessing games

[Am****]

I also have some learning and social language learning disability’s. It’s hard for me to always pick up on what she need if you don’t say it right to my face. At times just say hey I need this or can you do this for me, or hey I really like when you do this. Those bit will make me to like Ho shit I’m sorry. But with also make me be ok I need to do this

[dominionhub]

Some of it is timing.

Are they feeling playful?

[al****]

Establishing cues or body language is key with me. A wink. A devilish smile. A small tantrum. I have a hard time distinguishing between actual conflict and brattiness sometimes. So I error on the side of conflict and move to resolve it. Direct statements work the best. "Daddy pay attention to me," "I feel rotten," "I've been naughty. " avoid confrontational statements like "Daddy doesn't love me" if you call the relationship into question it generally spirals and sows seeds of concern and doubt leading to destruction.

[TimberTara]

Try something different

[Little_Duck]

ok, i want one person but i don't have a partner yet. That is why i am being on a website (not this one) where i mention in my profile more specific what i want in bdsm and that i am being a brat. Because otherwise i find only men that don't like the same things or not even like bdsm at all. it is difficult to find a match and i don't like wasting my time that is why i did that. but than they start chatting with me and after 1 or a couple conversations a lot of those men say "i know you are a brat but" or "you are so bratty." While i just tried to explain something serious or even explain my own boundaries and not doing bratty at all cuz i don't even know them. 

 

if i really like somebody i do bratty sometimes more in the form of soft teasing (verbal) i don't ask consent for that but i notice if other people being just verbal bratty to me they also never ask my consent. It is also difficult to ask a consent if you do many different things verbal.

Ofcourse for more extreem verbal or for physical things i ask consent than they also recognise it if it is more extreem.  But i almost never do that, i am more doing the subtile verbal things or letting them do things and those are much harder to recognise.

 

 

[Little_Duck]

  53 minutes ago, alpha420fet said:

Establishing cues or body language is key with me. A wink. A devilish smile. A small tantrum. I have a hard time distinguishing between actual conflict and brattiness sometimes. So I error on the side of conflict and move to resolve it. Direct statements work the best. "Daddy pay attention to me," "I feel rotten," "I've been naughty. " avoid confrontational statements like "Daddy doesn't love me" if you call the relationship into question it generally spirals and sows seeds of concern and doubt leading to destruction.

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That is a good one. i can try that thanks.

[al****]

  19 minutes ago, Little_Duck said:

That is a good one. i can try that thanks.

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My favorite tantrum is when she stomps into the room and sets down hard on her knees and bum and crosses her arms and pouts. This is my que that either I've been too busy to see her needs or she needs me. Either way, I figure out how to make my baby girl happy again even if that means paddles and cuddles.

[CopperKnob]

  17 hours ago, BackRubsNBruises said:

This might be an unpopular take, but you can’t brat without consent and / or dynamic of some level (that can be a single scene). Anything else is sarcasm or humour.

Brats still need to be ethical, which means they need consent. You can’t have consent without a conversation about what is considered bratting and where the line is. It isn’t a free pass to act out at anyone who labels themselves as a Top or Dominant.

I think you’ll continue to be misunderstood until you start having these conversations. It’s hard at first, but very quickly becomes easy.

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Not an unpopular opinion, I wrote a whole post about it a while back.
.
OP, IMO, there is no way that you are going to be able to brat with someone new online successfully.
You need to know each other well. You need to have explained why you brat, what it looks like, and what you expect as a response. It needs to be agreed upon, and it needs to be done respectfully.
People online won't pick up nuances of facial expressions/body language/tone of voice.
Just some of the many reasons why you may be being misunderstood.

[Sp****]

Call them an idiot and run away because they likely have no idea how a Brat behave, or are extremely inexperienced

[Ba****]

  11 hours ago, Spyro666 said:

Call them an idiot and run away because they likely have no idea how a Brat behave, or are extremely inexperienced

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Do all brats behave the same then?

[ow****]

I agree with a solid sit down and discuss what you hope to receive and visa versa both parties should be aware of what the other party needs and want before you show your side of the game but I am new to all of this so just take my advice as my opinion on this matter

[Vo****]

My brat tamer in training sometimes has a hard time noticing my bratting because I’m sarcastic, sometimes snotty, and defiant, but never in a rude, or disrespectful way. My normal personality mimics this but to a much less degree. I’ve started saying things like… “you’re just gonna let me brat, huh?” Or “that’s right, I’m the boss, and I can do what I want” to give him more direct verbal cues that I’m bratting. It’s helped a lot with him being able to differentiate when I’m bratting and when I’m just being my normal sarcastic self. Discussing my brattiness, future expectations, what we liked/disliked, what we want to try next time, and general discussion of the scene afterwards has helped greatly as well. Communication is important. <3

[ow****]

I feel like communication is very important thanks voodoo

[Pixiedreamloser]

  Thursday at 06:08 PM, VoodooPrincess222 said:

My brat tamer in training sometimes has a hard time noticing my bratting because I’m sarcastic, sometimes snotty, and defiant, but never in a rude, or disrespectful way. My normal personality mimics this but to a much less degree. I’ve started saying things like… “you’re just gonna let me brat, huh?” Or “that’s right, I’m the boss, and I can do what I want” to give him more direct verbal cues that I’m bratting. It’s helped a lot with him being able to differentiate when I’m bratting and when I’m just being my normal sarcastic self. Discussing my brattiness, future expectations, what we liked/disliked, what we want to try next time, and general discussion of the scene afterwards has helped greatly as well. Communication is important. <3

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Thats actually so helpful thanks ^^