A submissive likes to be controlled, relishing someone else taking responsibility away from them. Some are subservient and submit willingly. Others are brattier and put up a fight. There are also submissives who will fight sometimes and be subservient at others.
Submission can be confined to the bedroom or only taken out to BDSM and Fetish clubs and dungeons or it can used in all kinds of day to day situations. Some submissives chose to be subservient in all their roles, others take on submission to escape the responsibilities of work and family life.
Submissives let someone else take control. They may have a list of rules to abide by set by their Dom/Domme. If rules are broken then there will be punishments too as well as rewards for good behaviour. Some submissives love to be naughty and punished, others want to be good and strive to do their best and be rewarded. Others will want a mix of the two.
It isn’t all about humiliation and degradation for a submissive, unlike other bottoms they are more concerned with being subservient and giving over control to another person.
Which BDSM archetype matches well with a submissive?
Submissives often pair with dominants, who are all about control. Submission and Dominance are two sides of the same coin, one can’t exist without the other. Submission has many aspects. Some will only be submissive in play others will be more inclined to be slave-like in their devotion to their Dom/Domme.
How to be submissive
There isn’t just one way to be submissive, every sub is unique in the way they submit.
Some submissives may enjoy humiliation, age play or being a bottom for impact play or rope. They can choose to submit in many different ways. They aren’t necessarily interested in receiving pain or being restrained in particular. A submissive enjoys being subservient in a variety of situations.
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Wanted to see what do you consider the most important and desirable traits of a sub? Behavior, tasks, etc...
Looking forward to seeing your responses below! ...
The idea of a submissive journal was recently brought to me. I couldn’t find a lot of information online about it. What is a submissive journal, what kind of things do you put in it, do you share it ...
I’ve noticed that there is a lack of dominant females and an excess of submissive males. This makes it harder to fulfill my fantasy and kink. Anyone have any suggestions? ...
Dominants like to be in control. Unlike BDSM tops or sadists, their need is not particularly to inflict pain but to be domineering and have control over another person. Some Doms/Dommes expect to be obeyed immediately and without questions. Others enjoy being tested, and having to show their dominance over the submissive who’s being bratty.
There is no one way to be a Dominant. Dom/Dommes can also be sadists, tops, masters or riggers. Dominant is a huge category of BDSM made up of many very different people who all have one thing in common, their need to be in control.
The D in the term BDSM stands for Dominance, therefore Dominants are an instrumental part of BDSM.
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Daddy Dom or Mommy Dom is the term for a certain type of Dominant who enjoys taking on a caring and nurturing role. They mainly match up with girls/boys otherwise known as 'littles'. DDLG stands for Daddy Dom/Little Girl and is a term often used in the BDSM community.
Daddy Dom and Mommy Dominants enjoy control, as all Dominants do. Their control can be in the form of written rules, choosing outfits as well as making lots of decisions for their littles. Daddy and Mommy Dominants are patient and caring, which is why they match up so well with the child-like littles.
BDSM comes into the Daddy and Mommy’s relationships with their littles in different ways. They strike a balance between encouraging the little’s child-like joy and enthusiasm and showing them the control they crave for. This is why they carry both the name Daddy or Mommy and Dominant at the same time. Caring in a parental type roll and controlling as a Dominant.
Daddy Doms and Mommy Doms are often instinctually good at aftercare because of their especially nurturing natures. This is essential when matching up with littles as they need lots of care and attention before, during and after a BDSM scene.
Slaves are submissives who totally give all control over to their Master/Mistress. The main difference from other submissives is that they hand over control of all their life, 24/7 to their top. There can be pre-agreed exceptions to this rule. For the purposes of work for example but by vast majority a slave hands over all decision making to their Dom.
BDSM slaves are happiest when serving a Dominant. They tend to not have limits with their Master/Mistress. This is because their dynamic is very close. The Dominant knows his/her slaves limits and keeps to them.
This is a very unique relationship and is one to build up to. Slaves start out as submissives first and after time become a slave. Slaves, even more so than submissives, tend to wear some kind of symbol of their BDSM slave status. This can be a collar or a piece of jewellery that symbolises their belonging to their Dominant.
Slaves give complete trust to their Dominant, freeing their minds from worry and responsibility. It is a very unique roll and one that only certain submissives can take on.