Being a Dom with mental health issues

[MasterDemonFire]

Being a Dom with mental health issues isn’t easy at all other people don’t understand what you are going they or why you withdrawal at times

[Cheshire]

I have health conditions & hidden disabilities. So I have a rough idea of where you’re coming from. I can’t say I understand because it’s different for all of us. I don’t know about you but for me I find that if I explain the best I can )how can you explain something you don’t fully understand) from the outset it can help because in a way it ***s people to show their true colours from the start. If they runaway then they’re not worth having in your life. Any long term illness or disability doesn’t stop us wanting to live our lives the way we want but sadly we can’t so I make the most of it when I can. Hopefully people in general not just in the kink community will realise that despite our issues we are all different. All we ask for is a bit of understanding, touch wood I have that on here unlike on some other non BDSM sites. Hope you do too.

[Deleted Member]

Its hard no matter what when you have mental health issues, I have them but I am honest with people and let them know, But I know what you mean when you feel lile youare withdrawaling as the sub thenthinks oh you are losing inerest with them

[Deleted Member]

I suffer with numerous issues, including extreme self-loathing, depressive numbness, and crippling social anxiety. Though in the online world, I can create an image that doesn't show any of that. During my virtual roleplays, my partner perceives only the character I'm portraying, effectively hiding my real self.

However, I'm not without problems. When my mental state grows extreme from time to time, my ability to mask it is impaired. So, I'm unable to portray the flawless characters like I usually do. Which means I have to pause the play and stop all contact for some time, until my mind gets better.

[Mz****]

Just one reason honest communication is key, no one but yourself at any given time knows how you're feeling, not such an issue of you're unattached, or a more casual player you can dip in and out without being missed as such while you try and deal with whatever is happening to you, whether that may be a manic or depressive episode, panic attack, anxiety or anything else.  Its when you try and hide things from a partner, playmate, or even just someone you've been talking to that it becomes a problem..they wouldn't know why you've withdrawn and probably blame themselves, especially if you're Dom, thinking you've ghosted/released them because of something they did or said, whereas if they were in the loop they'd be likely to understand and give you the space/time and even support you need..being Dom doesn't make us any less human, or any less prone to mental health issues.

I truly hope you've a medical professional you can talk to, if you don't, speak to your GP or find a therapist perhaps, or a trusted friend, bottling these types of feelings up is unhealthy.

[CylonBabySwitch]

Oh I feel you on the mental health issues. I am Bipolar and it causes issues with me being a sub.

[xa****]

thats some real talk bro

[Deleted Member]

Very true however when you do find someone who is willing to at least try to understand rather than tell you they know everything it is amazing.
It's extremely difficult I know from experience but honestly it is best to be open as it helps them to learn and it weeds out the nasty ones who just want to use you for their own pleasure.

[Tinkerbell-1977]

I’m in a very new dynamic.  We have both agreed that we enjoy being switches.  He is suffering with anxiety right now and I haven’t run, in fact I am trying to support him where I can, but I miss him.  I’m really struggling with not being able to see him right now.  If anyone has any tips on how I can increase my patience levels (!) or what to do while I’m waiting for him I would be so grateful.

[Luna_princess]

I've come across this via a comment that was made.
I'm a newbie sub and have been through mental health but I was honest with the dom I have been chatting with.
Yes it's difficult, even though it's talked about more it can still be hard for some people to know what to say or how to be supportive

[Deleted Member]

I think there are more people with mental heath issurs in D/s than in most other arenas. But I trully believe in the mutual support of one another in a good dynamic. It can be another chain that binds, rather than a stumbling block. 

Edited November 22, 2021 by Deleted Member

[BruiseWayne]

On 11/22/2021 at 6:55 AM, Pheonix2786 said:

I think there are more people with mental heath issurs in D/s than in most other arenas....

Ain't that the truth?

 

I'm beginning to think it's  a prerequisite for even being kinky in the first place, lol.

Edited November 27, 2021 by BruiseWayne

[ge****]

Monday at 11:55 AM, Pheonix2786 said:

I think there are more people with mental heath issurs in D/s than in most other arenas. But I trully believe in the mutual support of one another in a good dynamic. It can be another chain that binds, rather than a stumbling block. 

Are there? Or is it just through sites like this, and because of the nature of BDSM, that people talk about it more openly so it seems that way?

That said I agree with the mutual support and making it a positive comment.

[ey****]

there's a saying "people don't lie about mental health issues - they lie about being OK"
 

Mental health problems are prevalent in a lot of society - but - when you come into kink, it's an arena where communication is vital - so, yeah, it gets talked about more.