Femdom advice

[Da****]

Struggling to find a dominant woman that’s not looking for a paypig, I just want a relationship with a sub/dom element. Does anyone think going to events would be a better way to find a Goddess?

[rb****]

Ever consider a Themdomme?

[vicvega]

Hah, good luck, mate. I’ve came to the conclusion such a thing is so rare as to almost not exist. 90% are grifters, catfishers and fakes, the good 10% already have a sub or probably live a thousand miles away from you.

[vicvega]

Not counting pro Dommes, who ply a noble and honest trade

[ey****]

going to munches and events is ALWAYS a big boost.

Anyone you meet there in any capacity you know is

a) real

b) local or willing to travel to your area

However 

Don't expect there to be people there waiting for the newest fresh meat (well, this happens at some munches and events, usually guys waiting for naïve ladies, that's another story)

Meeting people and becoming 'known' both boosts your experience and is the best way to meet new people.  Real life experiences can also supplement your online experience.

It's just really about being realistic about expectations

[Deleted Member]

I tend to agree. I have been on the same frustrating route of Dommes wanting to extract ***. I believe that if they don’t want to meet first, they are not worth considering. I found a Pro Domme who I’ve been visiting for over a year now and she really does it for me. (My friend on my profile.)
There are a lot of sincere Pro Dommes, but you have to be very patient.
Your idea of events is probably the best idea, one that I must still try myself.

[Deleted Member]

This thread was a little disheartening. I have spoken to several women who almost immediately tried to extract *** from me. Fin dom is a thing, I get it. You might even say it’s preprogrammed.

[Deleted Member]

Ah, it's not easy to be fair, although I'd assume easier in Seattle than Ireland!

Really it depends what you want. If it's domme relationship and life style you should probably arrange to go to events and lean into community. Like any community the more value you bring the more acceptance and opportunities you will get

If it's just a kink you want to scratch maybe visit a professional but be careful who you meet and also don't expect you will be as comfortable doing an act as your fantasy might make you believe.

If its online fun just like in vanilla world guys tend to be more into it so you will be a magnet to findom along with scammers looking for your information/pictures to blackmail you. Always exceptions to rules but yea.....

[Deleted Member]

Online contact is always easy to scam. A meeting with the Domme before any dynamics. Or events rather, where you physically meet mostly sincere people.

[ja****]

I’m a femdom and usually if it’s promoted on our page it’s for ***. I don’t think going to a event u will find femdoms that don’t want *** honesty …. Your best bet would just be getting a regular gf and asking her would she be open to it.

[Sl****]

5 hours ago, vicvega said:

Hah, good luck, mate. I’ve came to the conclusion such a thing is so rare as to almost not exist. 90% are grifters, catfishers and fakes, the good 10% already have a sub or probably live a thousand miles away from you.

I agree loads. They live thousands of miles away from you or already have someone 😂 or they are just the wrong type of person I guess?

[Do****]

Yes very possible. Me a my cuckold are happy together. I have the opportunity to spend his *** how I plead. I don’t cuz I make my own *** and have pay pigs already. Exchanging *** is a trusted factor between both parties. Well it should be. That’s law.

[Mistress_Lascivious]

100% agree with @eyemblacksheep!!!

Getting involved with your local kink community is the best way to meet real, genuine people. It is important to keep in mind that not all events are for newcomers, so I would suggest attending a munch to make initial connections. There you can ask questions, get information, make friends, and become a vetted member of the community. You would be surprised by the opportunities that become available through networking. Good Luck!

[Li****]

Where do you find info on local community gatherings?

[ey****]

10 hours ago, jayla2332 said:

I don’t think going to a event u will find femdoms that don’t want *** honesty

on the contrary.  on the rare occasions someone has turned up to munches trying to get *** out of people, they've been very quickly shunned - because that's not what munches are about.    Similarly at events.  If you are speaking with someone at an event and ask about play and they say "sure, pay me" they're actually breaking the law in several countries 

So, I'm not saying it doesn't happen. But it's rare.

Mind.  Of course, again, it's also rare to find women waiting around for strange men to play with. 

[ge****]

Attending events and munches will certainly help though won't guarantee you meeting the dominant of your dreams.
.
You can also improve your chances of meeting someone on-line by getting more involved in sites like this through the forums and chat rooms, writing a profile that says more than "I want to meet a Goddess" and shows you have a level of knowledge about what you are looking for etc
.
It's undeniable that there are some who are looking for payment etc but they're quite easily spotted and avoided - is also worth reporting them when you come across them so the site can deal with them appropriately.

[Pe****]

Definitely attend munches and events in your area.

[Pe****]

18 hours ago, vicvega said:

Hah, good luck, mate. I’ve came to the conclusion such a thing is so rare as to almost not exist. 90% are grifters, catfishers and fakes, the good 10% already have a sub or probably live a thousand miles away from you.

We actually do exist, and guess what?? It’s hard to find a male sub as well! Someone you connect with on all levels. I’m tired of the amount of messages I get from “subs” who are self indulgent or who won’t take no for an answer. There’s a male sub on here in his 60’s that’s now put his age as 42😂 it’s ridiculous

[Pe****]

6 hours ago, LionDynamo said:

Where do you find info on local community gatherings?

Fetlife

[Da****]

So much amazing advice, thank you everyone!!

[ThumperG]

16 hours ago, PervyPenelope said:

We actually do exist, and guess what?? It’s hard to find a male sub as well! Someone you connect with on all levels. I’m tired of the amount of messages I get from “subs” who are self indulgent or who won’t take no for an answer. There’s a male sub on here in his 60’s that’s now put his age as 42😂 it’s ridiculous

Preach it ***! Shout it loud for the slacker kids in the back of the class who  don't want to make a true effort but just want to blame everybody else~Mistress 😉💜😎

[Pe****]

1 hour ago, ThumperG said:

Preach it ***! Shout it loud for the slacker kids in the back of the class who  don't want to make a true effort but just want to blame everybody else~Mistress 😉💜😎

I totally agree!!

[ThumperG]

11 hours ago, PervyPenelope said:

I totally agree!!

Honey... AS someone long ago was in a different position it was actually legally married in this lifestyle. You would think that I would have some tricks and tips they'd want to glean some knowledge from in order to move forward. But nope. What amazes me is that the newer ones seem to think they got it all together & need no guidance. Ok then, knock yourself out and see where it lands you Johnny Rocket! I tell them trust me there ARE plenty more of you than there will ever be of me. This is exactly why sometimes so many OF US over the years have decided to have multiples in our lives, as I have in the past. XO 😉💜😎😂

[Pe****]

8 hours ago, ThumperG said:

Honey... AS someone long ago was in a different position it was actually legally married in this lifestyle. You would think that I would have some tricks and tips they'd want to glean some knowledge from in order to move forward. But nope. What amazes me is that the newer ones seem to think they got it all together & need no guidance. Ok then, knock yourself out and see where it lands you Johnny Rocket! I tell them trust me there ARE plenty more of you than there will ever be of me. This is exactly why sometimes so many OF US over the years have decided to have multiples in our lives, as I have in the past. XO 😉💜😎😂

Yes!!! You go hun!! And Johnny rocket?? 😂😂I love it!!! My new go to name!!!X

[na****]

In response to the lovely PervyPenelope. Yes. You and they very much do exist. Do not ever accept anything or anyone less than you and they deserve. You deserve so much more 😘 You are a beautiful human being and Domme. Any sub should be both worthy and appreciative of you and that goes for all of you…Only give yourself to those who make your sunshine 🌞💖

For the record…I tried to post this at least seven times on PervyPenelope’s profile in regards to this thread. Technical issues I guess 🙄 I am not a stalker ✋🏻 I only hope PP will back me up 🙏🏻 Have a good one guys 😏

Edited April 19, 2023 by naughtynat
Rewording